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'I'm not sure if it's the programs or the commercials, but one is supposed to be a lot worse than the other.'
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"Why can't David Blaine just stick himself somewhere and not involve he rest of us?"
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The pop-culture critic's annual existential crisis."
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"Dad? Where did you go? I just asked you to explain that episode of Dr Who."
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"Something is very wrong here. This is my favorite show, and I used to hate it."
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'I can't hear a word with all that background music.' 'It's because it's a ballet.'
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"What a terrible night on telly, I didn't find one thing offensive."
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"Do you remember when the picture wasn't broadcasting properly last week? Viewers and critics are saying that was the most entertaining program we have broadcast in years."
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'At the moment he's watching the programme all the critics' agree is an insult to human intelligence...'
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'Honey, of course I don't have a clue about anything. I'm a critic!'
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"I'm not sure what to watch...'Enterprise' or 'Sabado Gigante.'"
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"Bad news - the critics are calling it a smart comedy."
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"The only thing good on TV is my drink."
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New TV Season...Dopey man watching new TV shows
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"Well, that really plumbed new depths…let's watch it again on their 'plus-one' channel."
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