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"Fox News has actually learned squat. Details at ten."
Tags:right wing, right wing news, bias, biased, biases, incompetent, incompetence, learn, learns, learning, tv news, news channel, news channels, channel, channels, conservative, conservatives, breaking news, breaking news story, breaking news stories, right wing media, republican, republicans, propaganda
Before Fox News
"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, this is Jack Kruthers on the toilet."
Tags:oversharing, overshare, status update, toilet, toilets, bathroom, bathrooms, restrooms, restroom, loo, news, news channel, news channels, news stations, news station, tv, television, televisions, world news, social media, useless information, news anchor, news anchors, toilet humour, toilet humor, nobody, every day person, social media friend, social media friends, everyday events, everyday event, uninterested, social media oversharing, shared, share, sharing
Trump dries his hair with hot air
'Well, that's all the news, so I guess I'll just sit here and wait until something else happens.'
"The robbery and car chase are better in the movie but the hostage situation was definitely better on the cable news coverage."
Tags:television, televisions, watching television, tv, tvs, watching tv, t.v., t.v.s, watching t.v., cable news, cable news coverage, coverage, news coverage, news, news channel, evening news, film, films, movie, movies, based on a true story, action movie, action movies, action film, action films, scene, scenes, movie scene, movie scenes, film scene, film scenes, car chase, car chases, robbery, robberies, hostage, hostages, hostage situation, hostage situations, crimes, violent, violence, dramatic, realistic, real life, real-life, fiction, reality, dramatisation, dramatisations, dramatization, dramatizations, violent tv, tv violence, violent t.v., t.v. violence, television violence, violent television, desensitised, desensitized, better, entertainment, modern life
'Watch the news with the sound turned off. You're suffering from information overload.'
"Did you see who did this, sir?"
Slow News Day
Good evening. Tonight's broadcast will be to the point. Everything's horrible. Good night.
'Do you want to watch the, 'everything's terrible' cable news or the 'everything's wonderful' cable news?'
Sitcom News 'Hey, Marcia! Where's that darn news! I can't find it anywhere!'
Tags:news anchor, news anchors, news show, news shows, news channel, news channels, incompetent, incompetence, tv news, television news, sitcom, sitcoms, sitcom genre, sitcom genres, absent minded, absent-minded, absent-mindedness, absent mindedness, tv genre, tv genres, television genre, television genres
"Okay, kids, it's time to take shelter."
'...And, finally, we have a bit of 'good news'' ... 'I'm sorry, we've lost that portion of our program.'
"We've tried all the news channels - this guy is unbreakable."
Tags:news channel, news channels, 24 hour news cycle, news cycle, news cycles, cable news, tv news, tortures, interrogate, interrogates, interrogating, interrogation, interrogations, unbreakable, enhanced interrogation, enhanced interrogation program, crack, cracks, cracking, kidnapper, kidnappers, kidnapping, question, questions, questioning, terrorists, guantanamo, gitmo, unwatchable, bore, bores, boring, mainstream media, msm
Tags:news coverage, news coverages, news, news channel, news channels, news program, news programs, headline, headlines, breaking news, celeb, celebs, celebrity, celebrities, trivia, donald trump, president trump, trump administration, true crime, journalism, journalist, journalists, reporter, reporters, political coverage, political coverages
Local News in Heaven
24-7 News Channel
"Isn't technology great? We can see beheadings, homeless war refugees, citizens versus cops, fraternity lunch mobs, and government shut downs in hi-def."
Tags:headline, headlines, headline news, breaking news, news report, news reports, news program, news programs, bad news, current events, news story, news stories, news channel, news channels, government shutdown, terrorism, war refugees, social problem, social problems, press, press coverage, media coverage
"Now they've gone to far."
"I'm Robo, your evening news anchorbot..."
'You're right. The world's going to hell.'
"It's 100% commercials."
"A new survey shows only 3% of Americans take surveys, but everyone believes the stupid things."
Who will be the next CNN analyst?
Tags:democratic debate, democratic debates, democratic candidate, democratic candidates, candidate, candidates, presidential candidate, presidential candidates, job interview, job interviews, interview, interviews, news network, news networks, news analyst, news analysts, news, media, news channel, news channels, 2020 election, 2020 elections, election, elections, 2020 presidential race, presidential race