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'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'
Resistance Training: 'Are you going to resist training all day?'
"It lets you hold the President's attention for a few extra seconds before he wants to change channels."
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'I'm disappointed. I thought this was a show about Contract Law.'
Wake up love it's time to go to bed!
Newpaper reads: Cable Out - 1000s forced to read.
"What I don't understand is why people waste their time writing when they might not get published,."
'You're lucky. When I was a kid, we had to walk all the way over to the set to turn it on.'
'My mom wants us to stop watching cartoons and go outside. Let's take my laptop outside and watch cartoons.'
'But I can't go to bed yet, Mom. Kids watch an average of seven hours of TV a day, and I've only watched five and a half hours.'
'When he crashes I just disconnect all the wires and peripherals and shut him down for a few minutes. He'll boot right up after that.'
'If reading books is so important, how come you never see people on TELEVISION doing it?'
'If the 11 o'clock news gives you insomnia, don't watch it.'
You've been staring at that screen all day. Why don't you do something else?
'Working from home is great! You can keep your mind occupied watching daytime TV.'
Customer to TV repair man - "Thank god you got here. I was beginning to wander around."
"It cost $699. But when you factor in the time wasted sitting in front of it, well, the real cost is enormous."
'Why are you watching a cooking show?'
'She discovered Gordon Ramsay.'
Worshiping the TV.
Mom! Of course I know it's spring outside! Look at all the allergy commericals!