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"I'm glad to see that almost everyone has been taking advantage of the new executive fitness center."
Tags:fitness, fit, gym, gyms, muscle, muscles, muscular, health, buff, workout, workouts, working out, weight lifting, weight lifter, weight lifers, lifting weights, exercise, exercising, board room, board rooms, meeting room, meeting, meetings, meeting rooms, office, offices, fitness center, fitness centers, fitness centre, fitness centres, coworker, coworkers, scrawny, little, out of shape, in shape, body builder, bodybuilder, body builders, bodybuilders
"How about some little pads and pencils?"
Tags:the round table, king arthur, medieval times, monarchy, olden days, the olden days, meeting, meetings, board meeting, board meetings, business meeting, business meetings, suggestion, suggestions, board room, board rooms, government, mythology, knights of the round table, knights, english mythology, democracy, democratic, camelot, knights of camelot
"Damn it, Farrell, if you're going to blow the whistle, blow it!"
Tags:whistle, whistles, whistler, whistling, whistleblower, whistleblowers, whistle blowers, whistle blower, meeting, meetings, anticipate, anticipates, anticipating, anticipation, suspense, live in suspense, living in suspense, wait, waits, waiting, other shoe, other shoe to drop, nervous, nervousness, tortures, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, ref, referee, referees, refereeing, impatient, impatience, lose patience, losing patience
'I have good news and bad news. The problem is, I don't know which is which.'
"Just once I'd like to see us pass something on a voice vote."
Tags:horse, horses, board room, board rooms, business meeting, business meetings, board meeting, board meetings, vote, votes, business executive, business executives, executive, executives, neigh, neighing, voice vote, voice votes, anthropomorphism, anthropomorphic, policy, policies, making policy, passing policy, business policy
'Would you please send in one of my 'yes-man' to break this tie?'
"All power to the board of directors!"
'And Mr. Hedgly's proposal passed 8-1, with our former board member, Mr. Simms, casting the only 'nay' vote.'
"We're grateful that you're here, Wilson, considering that you were chairjacked this morning."
Tags:board meeting, board meetings, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, territory, territories, territorial, violent, violence, table, tables, meeting, meetings, musical chairs, chair, chairs, seat, seats, seating, executive, executives, immature, immaturity, annoying, annoyance, annoyances
'To put it simply, our policy just isn't complicated enough.'
'This is the most dysfunctional company I've ever seen. Everyone is in complete denial about the elephant in the boardroom!'
'To begin with, I'd like to apologise for my behavior at our recent meeting!'
'He's 'old school', he still drinks coffee at meetings.'
The Chairperson must be empowered to ensure that no individual or individuals dominate the meeting and discourage others from having their say.
"First of all, this meeting never happened."
Tags:meeting, meetings, witness, witnesses, witnessing, secret, secrets, secrecy, top secret, spill the beans, spills the beans, spilling the beans, business meeting, business meetings, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, classified, classified information, conspiracy, conspiracies, criminal conspiracy, criminal conspiracies
"And I'm sure no one will mind if we fold a few clothes while we talk."
Tags:laundry, laundry basket, laundry baskets, laundry day, washing, fold, folds, folding, multitask, multitasks, multitasking, multitasker, multitaskers, stereotype, stereotypes, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, meeting, meetings, gender stereotype, executive, executives, housework, homemaker, homemakers, clothing, woman, glass ceiling, glass ceilings, chore, chores, doing chores
"You're late, Myers!"
Tags:executive, executives, manager, managers, boss, bosses, business executive, business executives, business manager, business managers, meeting, meetings, board meeting, board meetings, business meeting, business meetings, workaholic, workaholics, workaholic, over worked, sleeping at work, incompetent, incompetence, board room, board rooms, morning, mornings, monday, mondays, nightmare, nightmares, modern life
"That was a fine report, Barbara. But since the sexes speak different languages, I probably didn't understand a word of it."
Tags:report, reports, sexist, misogynist, misogynists, misogyny, business, businesses, corporate culture, boys club, boys clubs, boys' club, boys' clubs, club, clubs, glass ceiling, glass ceilings, women in the workplace, communicate, communicates, communication style, communication styles, sex difference, sex differences, gender difference, gender differences, gender divide, wage gap, wage gaps, income gap, income gaps, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, psychobabble, psychology, feminist, feminists, feminism
'Speaking for myself and every other right-thinking person...'
'We have to go back to thinking 'inside' the box.'
'Slap me when he's done. I'm putting myself into a self-induced coma.'
"Well, now that we've established that we're all wearing Tommy Hilfiger underwear, can we proceed to the substance of the meeting?"
Tags:designer, designers, designer label, designer labels, fashion designer, fashion designers, underwear, underpants, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, divert, diverts, diverting, diversion, diversions, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, meeting, meetings, business meeting, business meetings, drop your pants, drop your trousers, business culture, corporate culture
Board of Cronies
"Now, if all of you would do me the favor of arranging yourselves into a human pyramid, I will reenact my ascent of Everest."
Tags:mount everest, human pyramid, human pyramids, mountain, mountains, mountain climber, mountain climbers, mountain climbing, rock climber, rock climbers, rock climbing, reenactment, reenactments, chairmen, chairman, board, boards, board room, board rooms, boardroom, boardrooms, 50th anniversary, george mallory, andrew irvine, tenzing norgay, edmund hillary
Our New Slogan: Make Money.