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"There are only three signatures on this recall petition. Monday Night football, therefore, will remain in effect until further notice."
"You know, I never really thought to ask - I just assumed he knows they can't hear him."
'I think he just heard Harbaugh vs. Harbaugh one too many times.'
"No, your dad isn't crying because he's sad. He's crying because he's happy that high school football has started."
"Make up your mind - it's me or football!!"
'If football didn't exist, what would you do new year's day?'
'Well, I don't know much about sport, but I know what I like.'
"Quickly, there's nothing about the World Cup on the TV for a few minutes."
"All I know is, sometime during the fall, he stops yelling 'You're blind ump!', and starts yelling 'You're blind, ref!'."
"Honestly mate, I'm not really into football...THIS is actually a rare skin condition..."
"There's an extra $50 for you if you keep the set in the shop until after football season."