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"When did you first become aware of this imagined 'plot to get you,' Mr. Potter?"
Tags:therapist, therapists, therapy, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, psychiatrist, psychiatrist, psychiatry, paranoid, paranoia, paranoid fear, paranoid fears, paranoiac, paranoiacs, plot, plots, plot against you, plotting against you, fear, fears, worry, worries, conspiracy, conspiracies, conspiracy theory, conspiracy theories, victim, victims, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, justified, justification, justifications, fearful, bad guy, bad guys, out to get you
"Look, you've got to accept some curtailment of your freedom in exchange for increased security."
Tags:curtail, curtails, curtailing, freedom, freedoms, security, tradeoff, tradeoffs, trade-off, trade-offs, surveillance, surveillance state, surveillance states, tortures, tortured, enhanced interrogation, prison, prisoner, prisoners, human rights, human rights violation, human rights violations, ground zero, crimes, terrorism, terrorists, fear, fears, paranoia, paranoiac, paranoiacs, security increase, security increases, increased security, patriot, patriotism, patriot act, patriotic, police state, police states, justification, justifications, justify, justifies, justifying
Tags:failure, disappointment, money, bummer, bummers, bum out, bums out, bumming out, concern, concerns, paranoia, paranoiac, paranoiacs, cheat, cheats, cheater, cheaters, spouse, spouses, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, hot dog, hot dogs, sausage, sausages, how hot dogs are made, how sausages are made, bad news, fear, fears, fearful
"Watch it. Here comes the law."
Tags:law, laws, starfish, starfishes, seastar, seastars, sea star, sea stars, police, police department, police departments, badge, badges, police badge, police badges, lawman, law man, paranoia, paranoid, paranoiac, paranoiacs, school of fish, marine biology, marine biologist, marine biologists, ichthyologist, ichthyologists, ichthyology
"I told you it wasn't the cops...you just shot a Jehovah's Witness!"
"Well, Phil, after years of vague complaints and imaginary ailments, we finally have something to work with."
Tags:optimism, psychology, hypochondria, doctors, medical, hypochondriac, hypochondriac, bad news, deliver bad news, delivers bad news, delivering bad news, diagnosis, diagnoses, bedside manner, doctor, physician, physicians, imaginary, illness, illnesses, sickness, sicknesses, disease, diseases, paranoid, paranoia, paranoiac, paranoiacs, symptom, symptoms, vague symptom, vague symptoms, mankoff
"Hey! Is that a tiny speaker making ocean noises, and a little camera?"
Tags:beach, beaches, shell, shells, spy, spies, spying, hear the ocean, hears the ocean, hearing the ocean, conch, conch shell, conch shells, hidden camera, hidden cameras, deceive, deceives, deceiving, deception, deceptions, paranoia, paranoid, paranoiac, paranoiacs, surveillance, government surveillance, seaside, seasides
Tags:road trip, road trips, drive, drives, driver, drivers, driving, road rage, road rages, guilt, guilty, worry, worries, anxiety, anxieties, sarcasm, sarcastic, ironic, irony, ironies, passive aggressive, thought, thoughts, private thought, private thoughts, frustration, frustrations, commute, commutes, morning commute, morning commutes, paranoid, paranoia, paranoiac, paranoiacs, timid, timidity, assertive, assert yourself, asserting yourself
Greetings from Hypochondria House
"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."
Tags:thank you, thank you card, thank you cards, gift, gifts, present, presents, appreciation, appreciations, insincere, insincerity, white lie, white lies, sincere, sincerity, paranoia, paranoid, paranoiac, paranoiacs, worry, worrier, worriers, gift giving, gift giver, gift givers, text, texting, text message, text messages, ambiguity, ambiguous
"Handwriting analysis has revealed that Spencer is not in fact my husband."
"They say this call may be recorded. Nowadays, that's redundant."
Tags:recording, recordings, spy, spies, spying, paranoia, paranoid, paranoiac, paranoiacs, redundant, redundancy, recording device, recording devices, monitor, monitors, monitoring, surveillance, government surveillance, hack, hacks, hacking, hacker, hackers, listen in, listens in, listening in, phone call, phone calls, mobile, mobiles, cell phone, cell phones, phone, phones
"When did you start lining your crown with tinfoil?"
"Sergio, you can't put me in a nursing home!"
Tags:baldo, fit, physically fit, physical fitness, nursing home, nursing homes, retirement centre, retirement center, retirement community, retirement communities, put out to pasture, good health, healthy, old person, old people, senior citizens, paranoid, paranoia, paranoiac, paranoiacs, healthy life, healthy lives
"Here comes Mr. Vasquez. He always thinks people are talking about him."
"Baldo, do you ever hear voices?"
"Okay, for some reason, we're illegal."
Tags:baldo, illegals, illegal immigrant, undocumented, undocumented worker, undocumented workers, epithet, epithets, strike fear, strikes fear, striking fear, paranoia, paranoid, paranoiac, paranoiacs, disguise, disguises, disguising, cops, police, ice, immigration enforcement, immigration enforcement officer, immigration enforcement officers, wanted, criminal, criminals
Cure for Paranoia Discovered: 'Sure -- that's what they want you to think!'