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"Nacho, I let you borrow $500 last year...and you've only paid back $20."
"Did you lend Cousin Nacho money to buy seats for his Chevy Torpedo?"
'We used to be the Friendly Loan Co, but things have tightened up in financials.'
'If lending money is against your principles, how about making a small gift?'
'The fact that we have loads of money - and you're skint, is hardly the basis for us to offer you a loan, Mr Jones!'