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"They're marinated in hot water for six hours."
"You'll see, the trick to surviving as a stray dog is to know when garbage night is for each street in town..."
'Just a couple of years ago, he was best in show.'
'I don't have to beg anymore, I have a trustfund.'
'I don't know who I am - they can't agree, so everyone calls me by a different name.'
Dog catcher: 'Ha! And they said I was unelectable!'
"I used to be a successful police drug dog, until I started snorting instead of sniffing."
Dog Holding Sign: Can't Fetch