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"We opened our newscast with the question, 'Did a U.F.O. land on Staten Island?' We can now report that did not happen."
Tags:television, televisions, watching television, tv, tvs, watching tv, t.v., t.v.s, watching t.v., news, newscaster, newscasters, reporter, reporters, announcer, announcers, broadcaster, broadcasters, newsman, newsmen, news anchor, news anchors, anchormen, anchorman, presenter, presenters, media, broadcasting, reporting, headline, headlines, clickbait, sensational journalism, sensationalism, fake news, exaggeration, exaggerations, exaggerating, spaceship, spaceships, flying saucer, fly saucers, ufo, ufos, u.f.o., u.f.o.s, unidentified flying object, unidentified flying objects
Comparing the headlines of three different New York based newspapers.
Tags:new, newspaper, newspapers, new york, new york city, ny, nyc, daily news, journalism, reporting, sensationalism, headline, headlines, front page, front pages, front page news, reporter, reporters, journalist, journalists, tabloid, tabloids, current events, current affairs, media, press, gutter press, sensational journalism, exaggerating, exaggeration, fake news
"How do I feel? I feel that your question is trivial, courts sensationalism, and is designed to appeal to appallingly base instincts. Additionally, it demeans my intelligence. Next question."
'I can't open a paper without reading another grizzly story.'
"It's all roadkill, and never a word about the chickens who get to the other side!"
Tags:joke, jokes, why did the chicken cross the road, bad news, media, media coverage, bias, biased, sensational, sensationalist, sensationalism, journalist, journalists, journalism, complain, complains, complaining, complaint, complaints, gripe, gripes, griping, roadkill, cross the road, crossing the road, exaggeration, exaggerate, exaggerates, exaggerating, danger, dangers, caution
"I blame all the violent cave paintings."
Tags:cave, caveman, prehistory, prehistoric, pre historic, pre-historic, pre-history, cavemen, neanderthal, neanderthals, homo sapien, homo sapiens, homo erectus, early man, early men, stone age, stone-age, stone ages, stone-ages, dark age, dark-age, iron age, iron ages, bronze age, bronze ages, violence, violent, tv, television, video, vidya, video games, absurd, media, sensational, sensationalism, sensationalist
"History Channel Bingo"
Tags:tv, tv channel, tv channels, channel, channels, tv network, tv networks, television channel, television channels, television network, television networks, cable, history, pop history, history channel, bingo, bingo card, bingo cards, predictable, predictable, pseudodocumentaries, pseudodocumentary, historian, historians, sensationalism, sensational, bad documentaries, bad documentary, dumbed down, dumbing down
Moses returns with the Tabloids.
Tags:religion, religious, bible, biblical, old testament, exodus, book of exodus, deuteronomy, book of deuteronomy, moses, commandment, commandments, ten commandments, 10 commandments, decalogue, tabloid, tabloids, magazine, magazines, media, journalism, newspaper, newspapers, new, sensationalism, sensational journalism, press coverage, media coverage, press
Coincidence or What?
Tags:stats, statistics, bad stats, reporting, reporter, reporters, bending the facts, fake news, graph, graphs, correlation, correlations, unconnected, coincidence, coincidences, unlikely coincidence, unlikely coincidences, bad science, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, sensationalism, anxiety level, anxiety levels, peanut butter, anxiety disorder, anxiety disorders, scaremonger, scaremongering
Next on Fox! Clowns Without Makeup.
Tags:makeup, clown, clowns, expose, exposes, media expose, media exposes, hidden camera, hidden cameras, hidden camera investigation, hidden camera investigations, investigate, investigates, investigating, sensationalism, sensationalist, embarrass, embarrasses, embarrassing, humiliate, humiliates, humiliating, spy, spies, spying, local news, tv journalist, tv journalists, tv journalism, reporter, reporters, report, reports, reporting
"You each claim to be the child's mother yet one of you sold your story to the national enquirer."
Tags:religion, religious, bible, biblical, old testament, kings, books of kinds, solomon, king solomon, judgment of solomon, judgement of solomon, wise, judge, judges, judgement, judgment, judging, baby, babies, child, children, kid, kids, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, parent, parents, family, families, magazine, magazines, tabloid, tabloids, news, newspaper, newspapers, gutter press, media, press, press coverage, media coverage, journalism, sensational journalism, sensationalism, greed, greedy, modern life
'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'
Tags:noah, noah's ark, holy bible, bible stories, old testament, biblical, biblical stories, the great flood, the flood, god, religion, religious, christianity, animals, hoarders, animal hoarders, disorders, compulsions, obsessions, obsessive, obsessive-compulsive disorder, animal services, protective services, authorities, tv, sensationalism, sensationalise, sensationalize, reality tv, television, entertainment, expose, news stories
"The nice thing about being a fruit fly is you only have to listen to one news cycle."
Tags:fruit fly, fruit flies, lifespan, lifespans, news cycle, news cycles, short life, short lives, shorten, shortens, shortening, shortened, bright side, glass half full, silver lining, silver linings, apple, apples, tv news, journalism, journalist, journalists, 24 hour news cycle, 24 hour news cycles, sensational, sensationalism, bad news
"...And I'm sentencing you to two additional years because your book about the crime was plagiarised."
'Right...so that's pages 1-6 on 'Teenage Thugs run Rampage', 7-9 on 'man sued £25,000 for cleaning neighbours path', the middle spread on 'Neighbours from Hell'...and the editorial on 'promoting the Big Society'.'
'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'
"Do you have to write down all the things you need to worry about?"
A family hides from the TV news report.
Fiscal cliff -- live
"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"
"Now, get out there and feed the zombies...I mean, deliver the news."
"It's the same every winter - another epidemic of norovirus stories."
Tags:norovirus, sick virus, sicky bug, sicky bugs, stomach bug, stomach bugs, stomach virus, stomach viruses, epidemic, epidemics, pandemic, pandemics, outbreak, outbreaks, germ, germs, virus, viruses, media, story, stories, sensationalism, winter, seasonal, seasons, illness, poorly, ill, sick, unwell, health, issues, flu, cold, colds, news, illnesses, bug, bugs, stomach, sickness
'Looks like we're out of murder, disease, and scandal, but this just in...there's a chance of rain. It's going to rain!'
Tags:news, new, reporter, reporters, tv, television, televised, televisions, sensational, sensationalism, sensationalist, fox, network, networks, broadcasting, broadcaster, broadcasters, journalism, journalistic, standard, standards, death, destruction, mayhem, journalist, journalists, integrity, hysteria, hysterical, bad, misfortune, disease, scandal, report, reports, story, stories, horror, fear, panic, headline, headlines
'In other news, the financial world has gone a full 48 hours, without a Goldman Sachs scandal.'
"And in what could be the biggest development for Hispanics in the history of the United States...hold it...I've just been told Hispanic Heritage Month is officially over. When we come back...hidden cameras in bathrooms! Only on the news at 5!"