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"You just self-deprecated yourself right out of a job."
Tags:job interview, job interviews, personnel, hr, human resources, self-deprecation, self deprecation, self-deprecated, self deprecated, fire, fires, fired, firing, performance review, performance appraisal, job appraisal, job review, personality type, personality types, job candidate, job candidates, job applicant, job applicants, modest, modesty, loser, losers, lose out, loses out, losing out, miss out, misses out, missing out
Gary began to think that his performance management meeting could have gone better.
"I called you here to discuss your track record."
"We've decided not to pay you anymore, but we are prepared to offer you 10% more meaingless platitudes about how valuable you are to the firm!"
"I admire your dogged determination."
Tags:performance review, performance reviews, job appraisal, job appraisals, appraisal, appraisals, performance appraisal, performance appraisals, dog, dogs, dogged, canine, canines, canine behaviour, canine behavior, dog behavior, dog behaviour, determined, determination, personality type, personality types, skill set, skill sets
"What do you mean I ask too many questions?"
'It's work, I can't help thinking there's someone following me. Monitoring everything I do.'
'I've reviewed your core progress modules and having reassessed them in the light of new strategy targets we've decided you need a kick up the backside.'
Tags:employee, employees, workforce, workforces, work-force, work-forces, worker, workers, incentive, incentives, motivated, motivational, motivated, motivate, motivates, motivating, motivational speaker, motivational speakers, employer, employers, target, targets, strategic target, performance review, performance reviews, performance appraisal, performance appraisals, appraisal, appraisals
'Some people claim that endless target setting and monitoring is a waste of money.'
'I guess our Performance Appraisal system is a little bit 'Old School'.'
'We're letting you go, Hank. Your job performance keeps on slipping.'
'I thought we'd save time on your performance review by moving to the 20th floor ledge now.'
"Fred, I'll be blunt: You lack inner toughness!"
'The boss just chewed me up and spit me out...'
'It's time for your annual carrot re-evaluation.'
'Well, this is a new low - even for you.'
'Instead of firing me, he could have tolerated mediocrity a little longer.'
'This year, executive bonuses are tied to performance. You owe us $50,000.'
'I'm surprised you like being your own boss. I am your boss and I hate it.'
'Minimalism is fine in design, but not in work attendance."
Tags:minimalism, minimalist, minimalists, interior design, interior designs, designer, designers, work ethic, work ethics, appraisal, appraisals, performance review, performance reviews, performance appraisal, performance appraisals, work attendance, attendance levels, slacker, slackers, slacking, skiving off, skiver, skivers
"I love your productivity, I love your team spirit and you haven't bitten anyone in months."
Tags:performance review, performance reviews, performance appraisal, performance appraisals, appraisal, appraisals, job review, job reviews, job, jobs, dog, dogs, dog behavior, dog behaviour, canine behavior, canine behaviour, productivity, loyal, loyalty, employee, employees, employer, employers, boss, bosses
"I've observed that on several occasions, when given the opportunity to assist a struggling co-worker, you instead chose merely to 'pity the fool'."
Tags:mr t, laurence tureaud, performance review, hr, human resources, personnel, performance review, performance reviews, job appraisal, job appraisals, performance appraisal, performance appraisals, boss, bosses, teamwork, team work, colleague, colleagues, co-worker, co-workers, coworker, coworkers, reality show, reality shows, reality tv, reality program, reality programs
"Why do I say you need to improve your attention to detail? For one thing, Tom, you've come to work without your pants again."
Tags:attention to detail, performance review, performance reviews, employee performance, performance appraisal, pa, performance evaluation, career development discussion, employee appraisal, forgetfulness, appraisal, appraisals, job skill, job skills, absent minded, absent mindedness, absent-minded, absent-mindedness
'I wish I could clone you, Jeff. Then at least you'd be mildly productive.'