Search by Search ID or Tag or use the Advanced Search
"To be fair, Martha, you started it."
"Seriously? You bought me a boa? How silly of you, Henry...no one wears those anymore!"
Tags:boa, boas, boa constrictor, boa constrictors, python, pythons, feather boa, feather boas, miscommunication, miscommunications, homonym, homonyms, formal wear, snake, snakes, herpetologist, herpetologists, reptile, reptile cage, reptile cages, makeup, make-up, dress up, dresses up, dressing up, gauche, out-of-date
Danger! Snake heaven.
"No, I get it. At some point, every friend I've ever had needs to take a break from me."
Tags:suffocate, suffocates, suffocating, suffocation, smother, smothers, smothering, break, breaks, take a break, taking a break, friend, friends, friendship, friendships, needy, clingy, neediness, high maintenance, maintain, maintains, maintaining, break up, break ups, breaking up, boyfriend, partner, partners, boa, boas, boa constrictor, boa constrictors, python, pythons, snake, snakes, relationship
Snake leaving bowling alley with bowler and ball.
A man who is having his toe pinched by a lobster dreams he is being strangled by a python.
"Well, the usual salary for a new staff member is one rat every two to three weeks, Mr. Shoodick."
'Please repeat, your last transmission was garbled.'
Snake offering 'Free squeezes'.
'Well I don't care what these placemats say. I think we're perfect for each other.'
Please wipe your belly.
The students of boa junior high suddenly realized that a year end field trip to the amusement park probably wasn't such a good idea
"Don't worry, Tabbey. We pythons are a natural for the Heimlich Maneuver."
"He's normally not affectionate, but he has really taken a liking to you!2
'kids, please! I haven't crushed anyone to death in weeks - can't I have this moment to myself?'
'Why, you're right! His eyes are bulging!...
'You need to unwind.'
'He won't hurt you, he's only being friendly.'
'In just three days it's taken two inches off my waistline.'
'In just four days it's taken three and a half inches off my waistline.'
'Oh, loosen up, will you?'
'Let go of me right now, and we'll forget this ever happened.'
May I get a little extra recess time, Ma'am? I've got to hunt and crush my lunch!
'..Wasn't I supposed to offer her an apple or something?'