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'So the good news is the operation was a total success. Bad news. . . we were out of hooks.'
'Maybe I should abandon my crew and keep all the treasure for myself!'
Tags:mutiny, mutinies, bird, birds, parrot, parrots, talking bird, talking birds, treasure, treasures, chest, chests, tattle tale, tattle tales, crew, crews, boat, boats, ship, ships, seafaring, cheat, cheats, backstabbing, captain, captains, pirate, pirates, piracy, buccaneer, buccaneers, brevity, brevity
An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.
Tags:flight, flights, cockpit, cockpits, pilot, pilots, engineer, engineers, engine drive, engine drivers, train driver, train drivers, train, trains, conductor, conductors, captain, captains, plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, ominous, worry, worries, fear, fears
"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."
Tags:bobblehead, bobbleheads, bobble-head, bobble-heads, team, teams, leader, leaders, leadership, leaderships, captain, captains, leadership skill, leadership skills, baseball, baseball player, baseball players, sportsmen, sportsman, athlete, athletes, ego, egos, self-esteem, self esteem, self confidence, vain, vanity
"Mommy's not home. Mommy's on a plane ride with Captain Yummy!"
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, father, fathers, dad, dads, family, families, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, infidelity, cheater, cheaters, extramarital affairs, affair, affairs, dating, plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, pilot, pilots, captain, captains, flight, flights, not home, modern life
'Ships plumber reporting for duty.'
'I'm a personal injury attorney. Have you ever been hurt on the job?'
Tags:pirate, pirates, captain, captains, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, solicitor, solicitors, injure, injures, injured, injury, injuries, claim, claims, claiming, claimed, compensation, compensate, compensating, compensated, personal injury, personal injuries, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"Must you precede everything you say with 'This is your captain speaking'?"
Tags:airport, airports, airline, airlines, pilot, pilots, plane, planes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airplane, airplanes, captain, captains, annoying habit, annoying habits, work/life balance, life/work balance, life-work balance, work-life balance, career, careers, taking our work home with you, bringing your work home with you, workaholic, workaholics
"By the time we got there, all we wanted to do was raid their kitchen."
Tags:knight, knights, soldier, soldiers, army, cavalry, horse, horses, armour, armor, commander, commander, captain, captains, spear, spears, weapon, weapons, stab, impale, medieval, history, raid, pillage, plunder, attack, kitchen, kitchens, food, eat, eating, steal, stole, stolen, hunger, hungry, starve, starving
"Lose the cap."
Tags:religion, religious, bible, old testament, book of genesis, genesis, noah, noah's ark, ark, arks, boat, boats, ship, ships, the great flood, captain, captains, ship captain, ship captains, hat, hats, cap, caps, fashion, captain hat, captain hats, sea captain, sea captains, lose, ditch, get rid of, god, god's voice, fashion critic, fashion critics, critique, critiques, critical, criticism, criticise, criticize
'He's going to walk the plank. The least we can do is let him stretch his quads first.'
"Your pilot is still de-icing."
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, pilot, pilots, captain, captains, de-icing, deicing, weather, bad weather, snowstorm, snowstorms, snow, snowing, ice, de-ice, deice, cold, winter, wintertime, drink, drinks, drinking, drinking alcohol, alcohol, alcoholic, alcoholics, liquor, booze, drunk, drunks, drunk driving, drunk driver, drunk drivers, dangerous driving, dangerous driver, dangerous drivers, dangerous, risky, delay, delays, delayed
"Good morning, folks, this is Captain Holwood from the flight deck. We'll be cruising at thirty-five thousand feet today, and I'll be finally taking control of my life, struggling to satisfy the needs of only one person—me!"
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, pilot, pilots, co-pilot, co-pilots, copilot, copilots, announcement, announcements, loudspeaker, captain, captains, mental health, self-esteem, self-confidence, ego, flight deck, flight decks, taking control, life, breakdown, breakdowns, divorce, divorces, split, splits, separation, separations, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, heartbreak, broken heart, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, family, families, family issues, family problems
The most embarrassing day in the history of the Swiss army.
Tags:swiss, switzerland, army, armies, knife, knives, embarrass, embarrassing, embarrassment, embarrassments, ran out, run out, unprepared, soldier, soldiers, general, generals, major, majors, sergeant, sergeants, captain, captains, toothpick, toothpicks, adapt, adapts, adaptable, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"This is your captain speaking."
Tags:pirate, pirates, pirate captain, pirate captains, piracy, captain, captains, pilot, pilots, piloting, co-pilot, co-pilots, announcement, announcements, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airplane, airplanes, plane, planes, flight, flights, passenger announcement, passenger announcements, pirate ship, pirate ships
Pirate ship airbag.
"Captain, we've taken on strippers."
"I have more underneath."
Tags:army, armies, military, militaries, medal, medals, navy, navies, airforce, air force, officer, officers, captain, captains, general, generals, commander, commanders, decorated, decorated officer, award, awards, awarded, brag, bragged, brags, bragging, dinner party, party, parties, guests, guest, strange guest, ouch
"Don't make eye contact..."
Tags:whale, whales, whaling, harpoon, harpoons, hunt, hunting, sperm whale, sperm whales, moby dick, moby-dick, whalers, hunter, hunters, whaler, captain ahab, ahab, hermn mellville, melville, eye contact, eye-contact, draw attention, attention, awkward, awkwardness, worry, worried, worries, captain, captains, harpooning, subway, subways, transit, mass transit, public transport, mass transits, literature, book, books, novel, novels, transport, tube, train, trains
"Isn't that other plane awfully close?"
Tags:plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, near miss, near misses, near hit, near hits, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, fear of flying, flight, flights, phobia, phobias, phobic, flying, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, fear, fears, safety, pilot, pilots, captain, captains, air travel, air travelling, fear, fears, fearful, nervous, anxious, anxiousness
It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.
"Honey, have you seen my pirate shirt?"
Colossus of Rhode Island
Tags:the colossus of rhodes, rhodes, helios, greece, greek island, greek islands, rhode island, rhode islander, rhode islanders, colossus, statue, statues, giant statue, giant statues, yacht, yachts, nautical clothing, nautical clothes, nautical style, ships captain, captain, captains, sailing, boat, boats, marini, martini drinker, martini drinkers, upper class, upper classes