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'I'm afraid I'm going to have to fail you. Sticking your head out the window while driving is incredibly dangerous.'
Road Rage Highway
Tags:road rage, dangerous driver, dangerous drivers, dangerous driving, driving school, driving schools, driver, drivers, see red, seeing red, rage, outrage, outraged, lose control, loses control, losing control, hurry, hurries, hurrying, highway, highways, motorway, motorways, freeway, freeways, insult, insults, insulting, furious, out of control, traffic school, traffic schools, driving instructor, driving instructors
"When I let out a blood curdling yell and scream 'Jesus Christ you're going to kill someone' I'd like you to apply the brakes..."
Tags:piano, piano lesson, piano lessons, lesson, lessons, driving lesson, driving lessons, driving instructor, driving instructors, manual transmission, manual, stickshift, stick shift, clutch, clutches, pedal, pedals, pianos, piano pedal, piano pedals, driver's ed, new driver, new drivers, gas, gas pedal
'Okay. Now, try to parallel park while talking on your cell phone and changing songs on your ipod.'
'Kid, you flunked the driving test. But you get high marks in audio system tuning, cell phone fumbling, and GPS fiddling.'
'Aren't you going to teach me how to drive while texting?'
Having not studied for any of the road tests, resulting in terrible road marks, and a very low grade, it was inevitable that the brakes would fail.
Wait, maybe it's, 'Keep your eyes on the road and your hands on the wheel'.
"Check your rearview mirror often. I'll provide feedback through rude hand gestures and screaming obscenities."
"Good boy. Now speed up a little and try sticking your head out even farther."
Tags:dangerous driver, dangerous drivers, distraction, distractions, distracted, driving instructor, driving instructors, driving teacher, driving teachers, driving lesson, driving lessons, dangerous driving, driver, drivers, driving licence, driving license, traffic cop, traffic cops, traffic police, transport police, transport cop, transport cops
'But every time I leave a five car space in front of me, six cars cut in.'
The driving lesson came to a sudden, disastrous end.
"In todays driving lesson we learn the importance of checking your blind spot."
Driver's Ed instructor: 'I would think about passing you, Albert, if you hadn't driven in reverse down the One Way the wrong way 60 miles an hour over an open manhole ...'kay?'
'Whoa! Easy on the clutch!'
Tags:driving lesson, driving lessons, driving instructor, driving instructors, learner, learners, drive, drives, driving, learning, ufo, ufos, spaceship, spaceships, flying saucer, flying saucers, alien, aliens, spacecraft, spacecrafts, pilot, pilots, piloting, crop circle, crop circles, explanation, explanations, explain, explains, newbie, newbies
"OK, that's enough for today. I think he's learned his lesson."
'Right hand down a bit.'
"You know how some writers are known as 'writer's writers'? I'm what's known as a 'driving instructor.' "
Tags:writer, writers, novel, novella, novels, novel writing, poem, poet, poetry, poets, poetic, literature, literary, word play, play on words, ironic, irony, author, authors, authored, book, books, book lover, writing, should be writing, you should be writing, manuscript, artistic, artist, artists, art, arts, culture, cultured, writer's block, cocktail party, dinner party, dinner parties, cocktail parties, driving instructor, driving, drive, driver, drivers, job, jobs, careers, career, friend, friends, introduce, introductions, business, boast, boasts, boasting, braggart, braggarts, bragging, term, terms, terminology, driving instructor, driving instructors
"Teaching drivers' ed isn't as bad as I expected."
Tags:driver's ed, drivers ed, driver's education, drivers education, driving lesson, driving lessons, driving instructor, driving instructors, driving teacher, driving teachers, student driver, student drivers, learner, learners, driver, drivers, teacher's lounge, teachers lounge, staff room, staff rooms
Learner driver conned into being a getaway driver
Edvard Munch's 'The Scream' goes for a ride with a crash test dummy.
Tags:autos, driving, art, painting, crash test dummy, crash test dummies, the scream, munch, edvard munch, frighten, frightens, frightening, driver's ed, driver's education, driving instructor, driving instructors, safety, unsafe, bad driver, bad drivers, road safety, speed, speeds, speeding, rush, rushes, rushing, hurry, hurries, hurrying
'Lucky that I lost your No-Claim Bonus last lesson.'
'There's that funny squealing again - I think it's coming from your side.'