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The cake was great and the icecream was delicious, but deep down inside, he knew that some day his parents would discover that 'f' wasn't for 'fantastic', and then none of it would be worth it.
"The bailout money, …. Cosgrove took it and bailed out."
"Well, I guess the bubble has burst over at Phillips Rodny Associates."
Tags:metaphor, metaphors, burst your bubble, business, businesses, bubble, bubbles, fail, failure, failures, failing, failed, failed business, men, businessmen, businessman, bankrupt, bankruptcy, financial bubble, finance, finances, financial, space, outer space, expression, saying, expressions, sayings, debt, debts, liquidation, liquidated, liquidate, insolvent, insolvency
Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News
Tags:alum, alums, alumni, alumnae, chance encounter, chance encounters, old friend, old friends, college friend, college friends, art school, art schools, visual arts, visual arts major, visual arts majors, faux pas, cringe, cringes, cringing, awkward, awkward scenario, awkward scenarios, awkward scene, awkward scenes, copywriter, copywriters, writing copy, copy, advertising agency, advertising agencies, career, careers, success, successes, successful, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, waitress, waitresses, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures
"I'm listing my deadlines by due date so I can miss them in chronological order."
Tags:deadline, deadlines, paperwork, due date, due dates, procrastinate, procrastination, procrastinating, lazy, laziness, chronological order, shirk, shirking, irresponsible, irresponsibility, business woman, business women, businesswoman, businesswomen, businessperson, businessperson, business people, modern life, modern attitudes, fail, failed, failing
Playfully skirting catastrophic failure since 1924
'Once again, you were right only fifty percent of the time. Have you considered a career as a TV weatherman?'
"We've invested too much in this whole thing to just go back to laying around on the rocks all day."
"The Sudden, Sure Knowledge That One's Best Efforts Have Come To Naught."
Tags:effort, efforts, death, deaths, die, dies, deadly, escape, vaudeville, song-and-dance, grim reapers, grim-reapers, grim reaper, grim-reaper, audience, audiences, dying, dies, cheating death, cheats death, performance, performed, barbershop music, barbershop, disappointed, disappointed, fail, failed, effort, efforts
"I'm a wunderkind slash flop."
Jeffrey N.: The Guy who managed to get the lead out of his pants, but they were still the wrong pants.
Tags:saying, sayings, cliche, cliches, cliched, get the lead out of one's shoes, get the lead out of your shoes, get the lead out of your pants, get the lead out of one's pants, wrong pants, retro, 70s, seventies, 1970s, disappointed, disappointment, fail, failed, failing, hurry, hurrying, faster, fast, go faster, wrong pants
"O.K. so clearly the sanctions didn't work."
Annual fear of failure marathon.
Sculptor's Attempts At Sculpting Crumpled Paper Ball End Up In Trash
Tags:concrete, marble, marbles, block, blocks, sculpt, sculpting, sculptor, sculpted, sculpts, statue, statues, model, modelling, art, artist, artists, artistry, artistic, artistically, artistic license, artistic licence, paper, fail, failure, failed, paper ball, paper balls, crumpled, scrumpled, indicative, indicative joke, metaphor, metaphorical, literal, literally
"Your butler, your father and I are concerned that with grades like these, you'll just end up being part of the 99%."
Tags:1%, one percent, one percenter, one percenters, 99 percenter, 99 percenters, 99 percent, 99%, report card, report cards, upper class, upper classes, elitist, elitists, elitism, snob, snobs, class divide, wealth divide, wealth inequality, economic inequality, economic inequalities, grade, grades, fail, fails, failing, failing grade, failing grades, school report, school reports, study, studies, studying
'So the happy meal didn't work.'
Tags:therapy, therapies, therapist, therapists, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, psychotherapy, psychotherapist, psychotherapists, happy meal, happy meals, fail, fails, failing, failed, scare, scares, scared, upset, sad, mental problem, mental problems, distress, distressed, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Your son's poor grades are caused by Attendance deficit disorder. . .'
Tags:attention deficit disorder, add, special needs, learning difficulty, learning difficulties, skipping school, skipping class, skipping lessons, classes, class, lesson, lessons, diagnosis, doctor, doctors, grade, grades, fail, fails, pupil, pupils, student, students, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"He won't get far without this!"
"Charlie, it's us, your teammates. We're here to help you. The other team's getting an awful lot of hits and we're worried."
Tags:worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, pitcher, pitchers, pitching, baseball, baseball player, baseball players, meeting on the mound, meetings on the mound, intervention, interventions, intervene, intervenes, intervening, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures, bad day, bad days, rough day, rough days, rub it in, rubs it in, rubbing it in, mistake, mistakes, accident, accidents, embarrass, embarrasses, embarrassing, humiliate, humiliates, humiliating, alcoholic, alcoholics, alcoholism
'Once again, you were right only fifty percent of the time, Have you considered a career as a TV weatherman'
Tags:kid, kids, school, schools, schooling, pupil, pupils, school children, school kids, teacher, teachers, lesson, lessons, subject, subjects, test, tests, exam, exams, examination, examinations, fail, failed, fails, failing, answer, answers, mark, marks, marked, weatherman, weather man, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"I suggest ordering the chef's special. It may help him regain his confidence."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, fine dining, dine, dines, dining, waiter, waiters, waiting on, waitress, waitressing, order, ordering, menu, menus, special, daily special, suggest, suggesting, suggestion, chef, chefs, fail, failing, poor, regain confidence, confidence boost, unconfident, rookie, unexperienced, customer, customers, inexperienced, lack of confidence
(When Worlds Collide) (Got a light?)
"The media is fake news, sad, failing and unfair - O.K., let the cameras in."
Tags:president trump, president donald trump, donald trump, trump, the donald, media, fake, news, fake news, faux news, sad, in despair, failing, failed, fails, fail, unfair, biased, cruel, dishonest, bigot, camera, cameras, hypocrite, hypocritical, hypocrisy, hypocritical behaviour, hypocritical behavior, media outlets, false claims, false claim, journalist, journalists, journalism, newspaper, newspaper reporter, newspapers, newspaper reporters, news
"I guess someone else with three wishes is wishing your three wishes don't come true."
"She's inconsolable since Mizrahi went belly-up."
Tags:inconsolable, belly up, goes belly up, going belly up, middle age, failure, failures, fail, fails, failing, house coat, house coats, worry, worries, worrying, fashion designer, fashion designers, fashion design, fashion designs, designer label, designer labels, going out of business, goes out of business