Drugs Companies Cartoons and Comics

"Make him take 15 of these a day until we feel better about what we're doing to him!"

'Now go out there, and tell all your friends to get some prescriptions filled this week.'

"Here at Pharmacorp we are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience."

'Pharmaceutical update: 'They got me producing antibiotics for cattle.' - 'That figures - I'm producing them for sheep.'

When did you start thinking there might be something wrong with you? When you told me!

'Generics of generics - that's the way we'll go.'

Marketing Spin

'You're in luck! A famous movie star has your disease, so there's been a telethon, and drug companies are working on a cure.'

'If we can't cure cancer, our hope is to turn it into a long-term profitbale disease.'

"I hate it when the palcebo does better than the drugs we're testing."

Research indicates seven deadly sins are treatable with drugs,

'Sorry, I'd like to help you, but when I lower prices on my drugs, it makes me ill...'

"It's called 'The Marketplace.' Just keep walking until you feel its inexorable pull. Good luck and stay in touch!"

"That new drug causes flatulence."

"It's what the people want. You run wild for a couple of hours and then - zap - you're back to normal."

Pharmaceutical industry versus public health.

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

Why the multinational cartel Apex Pharmaceuticals went down 7 5/8 yesterday.

"Would you prefer the artificial heart made by Venn-Trexx, or the generic, which costs a lot less?"

"Antacids, antibacterials, antibiotic, antidepressants, antispasmodics...we'd like something positive for a change."

"I'm not a real doctor, because I was I'd be sued for telling you this about Verocyl."

'What I call a miracle drug is one that doesn't start a government investigation.'

'If the drug has that any side effects, let's market it as a biological weapon.'

'We believe this could increase the average life span by 40 years. So far, its only done it by 17 minutes.'

'Make it something that rhymes with 'evaporate'.'