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'Yes sir, we still have Mr Edwards on hold from last thursday...'
"Would you like to hear some music while you hold."
"Sorry, sir, you'll have to hang on some more, but I'm going to advance you to priority-hold status."
Shouldn't the hotline have a connection to dial-a-prayer?
"Your call is important to us, you are currently number two hundred and eighty in a queue of two hundred and eighty three...!!"
Thank you for holding...
Now here's a place I like