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'Dad, have you ever thought about researching our family tree?'
'I did our branch of the family tree. Turns out we're birch and northern pine.'
"She was right....I AM a pig!"
"Yeah, my great-grandpa was shell-shocked in World War One too..."
'I'm tracing my relatives.'
'Quite a lot of divorce in my family!'
'One of my ancestors died at Waterloo.'
"Albert Morris? But I've spent the last six months researching Alberta Morris?!"
'I'm sorry, but we only do people.'
"This is your great-great-great-great-great uncle Pernico. I heard a lot of stories about him. He really wasn't all that great."
'Boy, my dad's geneology is strictly 'x' rated.'
'Lion tamer, apparently.'