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"If it please the court, I'd like to act as my own plucky young female attorney."
Tags:law, children, age, juvenile court, juvenile, juvenile game, juvenile games, kids game, kids games, mother may i, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, judge, judges, lawyer, lawyers, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, approach the bench, approaches the bench, approaching the bench, kid's game, kid's games, mankoff
"How was it? Hissy fit or kissy face?"
Tags:sexist, institutional sexism, male-dominated, legal system, legal systems, bro, bros, everyday sexism, institutional sexism, misogyny, misogynist, misogynists, lawyer, lawyers, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, judge, judges, insulting, insult, insults, executive, executives, corporate culture, corporate ladder, glass ceiling, glass ceilings, women in the workplace, workplace
We also find the defendant's lawyer guilty by association.
"Please direct your comments to the jury, counsellor, not the Greek chorus."
Tags:jury, juries, counselor, counselors, counsellor, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, courtroom, courtrooms, court room, court rooms, dramatic effect, dramatic effects, tragedy, tragedies, greek tragedy, greek tragedies, cassandra, greek chorus, greek choruses, fate, fates, fated, chorus, choruses
"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."
Tags:judge, judges, court, courtrooms, courtroom, law, laws, crime, crimes, criminals, criminal, trial, trials, lawyer, lawyers, defense, defence, defense attorney, prosecutor, solicitor, barrister, trial lawyer, defense attorneys, judging, ruling, rules, indignant, individual, individuals, character, characters, trial lawyers, defendant, defendants, guilty, not guilty, guilt, jury, honor, juries, weak defense
"Mind if I thump it? I'm a Bible-thumper."
Tags:bible, bible thumper, bible thumpers, fanatic, fanatics, religious fanatic, religious fanatics, fanaticism, swear in, swears in, swearing in, court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, jesus freak, jesus freaks, cross-examine, cross-examination, testify, testifies, testifying
"Oh, very well - make that life with the possibility of parole."
Tags:parole, paroles, begging, trial, trials, courtroom, courtrooms, court, courts, sentence, sentences, sentencing, life sentence, life sentences, life-sentence, life-sentences, judge, judges, prison sentence, prison sentences, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, defense lawyer, defense lawyers, trial attorney, trial attorneys, defense attorney, defense attorneys
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, say hi to my client."
Tags:law, juries, courtroom, lawyers, introduction, introductions, opening statement, opening statements, trial, trials, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, courtrooms, jury pool, jury pools, client, clients, butter up, butters up, buttering up, defense attorney, defence attorney, defense attorneys, defence attorneys, mankoff
"It's obvious, isn't it ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that the defendant has guilt written all over his face."
What barristers/attorneys are really thinking - "Beer."
Insurance Company representative with rabbi to lawyer and client: 'I brought hiim along to assure you we would negotiate in good faith.'
Man on crutches leaving courtroom: 'I got off on the wrong foot when I said the forklift ran over my right foot.'
'Is the person you saw with the gun here in the courtroom today, and if so, would you point him out for the jury?'
'We find the drifter guilty.'
First we sue the guy who saved your life. We'll file a no-class-action suit.
'He's training for a career in law.'
My father says your uncle the lawyer chases ambulances... He does not! He retired.
Trail Lawyers For The Pretentious - "J'accuse!", "Mais Non!"
"What do you mean 'you don't want to get involved'? You're my attorney!"
"How many crimes are you going to get me off and commit me back into those hell-hole streets out there!?"
Tags:legal system, legal systems, repeat offender, repeat offenders, crime, crimes, criminal, criminals, arrest, arrests, defense attorney, defense attorneys, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, trial attorney, trial attorneys, street crime, street crimes, attorney, attorneys, social problem, social problems, crime rate, crime rates
"Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty as a matter of self defense."
"We the jury find the defendant not guilty, but recommend a lengthy custodial sentence for his lawyer."
Tags:jury, juries, juror, jurors, criminal, criminals, trial, trials, jails, prison sentence, prison sentences, verdict, verdicts, jury foreman, jury foreman, courtroom, courtrooms, defense lawyer, defense lawyers, defense attorney, defense attorneys, trial lawyer, trial lawyers, trial attorney, trial attorneys, conviction, convictions, criminal trial, jail, custodial sentence, guilty verdict
"I'm beginning to think you are guilty."