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'Forget the wheel. Invent diapers.'
'It's not that I don't want more kids Victoria, I'm worried I won't have enough skin for their names.'
'This whole 'grandparent' thing -- it's our parents and children conspiring against us!'
'Why don't you just admit it? You only wanted children as a substitute for not having any pets.'
'The novelty's sort of worn off with the first one so we thought it was time to have another.'