Personnel Departments Cartoons and Comics

'For some strange reason personnel want us to review our equal opportunities employment policies!'

Organisational Structure

'Norman, mentoring is not about making everybody else the same as you.'

"This is where infrastructure meets personnel."

Target setting: 'What about 38%, we haven't used 38% for a while.'

'You'll be hearing from us! Hello?'

"I forgot to say I was breast-fed."

'Don't take you dismissal personally Jenkins. I had to fund my bonus somehow.'

'Can I be a decision maker? Well, yes and no.'

'Hold on for a moment sir, accounts receivable think they might be able to use a barbarian...'

We've cut out a lot of unnecessary middle management, or at least I think we have... There's no one left in HR to do a headcount!"

"Yes, I'm a decision-maker. Well, I think I am. Yes, I am. On ther other hand, I don't know. And then again...."

"There's no need to respond to every question with 'final answer'."

"I'll keep your application on file in case something else comes up"

Human Resources

'Do you want a salary or benefits?'

"Are you a decisive type person?"

"We don't pay very much. We don't work very much either."

"Whoever you are, you're hired."

'Why did you offer the job to this one?'

"I'm willing to relocate ... to somewhere sunny?"

"We only hire the lactose intolerant. They won't need the milk of human kindness."

'Careful. You still have that new-employee smell.'

"You don't even look good on paper."

"Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade."