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'Where do I see myself in five years? Well, if I make it through this day...'
"I'd like to talk to the warden about rescheduling my debt to society."
Tags:jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishment, punishments, debt to society, debt, debts, reschedule, rescheduling, warden, wardens, guard, guards, prison guard, prison guards, probation, intermittent sentence, sentence, sentences, sentencing, jail time, prison time, inconvenient, inconvenience, schedule, schedules, doing time
'Yes, I'm willing to accept the job on a 90-day probational basis. Do I report to my former probation officer?'
'I'll be supervising you...'
"It's a G.P.S. tracker. Apparently, I'm considered a 'flight risk'."
'...and Fred here will be your overseer.'
'Damn. I forgot to sack the staff.'
"Everybody says this is an awesome company to work for once you get through the probationary period!"
'I'm giving you a suspended sentence.'
"I got the job! Let's celebrate - but not too much. I have to wear this ankle bracelet until I pass the three-month probation."
Tags:job search, job searches, hired, probation, ankle bracelet, 3-month probation, privacy rights, draconian, rules, contract, slave labour, labor, worker's rights, take it or leave it, home - office life, drug testing, office, random drug tests, insurance, invasive, prisoner, employee, human resources, white collar crime, background check, references, celebrate, celebrates, party, drugs, alcohol, substance abuse, recreational drugs, drug test, employment, drug tests, drug testing
"If I didn't trust you I wouldn't be releasing you on your own recognizance."
"With most new hires, we find it takes a good six months for us to fully regret it."
"Hold on, Brandon. Let your probationary period expire before you start microwaving fish."
Tags:new hire, new hires, new job, new jobs, probations, probation period, probation periods, probationary period, probationary periods, trials, employee, employees, tip, tips, advice, mentor, mentors, staff room, lunch break, lunch breaks, employment, job, probation, trial periods, trial period, break room, fish, seafood, microwave, cooking, baking, lunch
"Since this is your first offence, I sentence you to clean your room."
"Hold my calls, Ms. Jensen, unless it's my probation officer."
'Congratulations. I hear you past your first month's probation.'
"You are hereby sentenced to one year of swimming with the people."
Tags:dolphin, porpoise, fish, sea mammal, swim, swimming with the dolphins, vacation, vacation excursion, lawyer, bailiff, courtroom, prosecutor, defense lawyer, bench, lawsuit, courts, judge, defense, justice, criminal justice, flight risk, criminal, defendant, law, trial, sentence, bail, probation, bond, dolphins, animal, animals, community service, sentencing
'Edward's a homebody, which serves him well now that he's on house arrest.'
'It's refreshing that you performed community service for some reason other than to get into a good college.'
"You misread the terms of your employment. Your probation period is 6 years, not 6 months."
For Lindsay down in LA land a Christmas gift that fits a DVD from drivers Ed.: 'Lohan's Greatest Hits'.
'The first time it was a fine. Second time, fine and probation. Third time...'
"You never want to be taken to see her. Ms. Walker moonlights as a probation officer."
Tags:principal, principals, moonlight, moonlights, moonlighting, moonlighter, moonlighters, probation officer, probation officers, headteacher, headteachers, headmistress, headmistresses, school, schools, schooling, discipline, disciplines, probation, probations, teacher, teachers, strict, strictness
'New hires have a probationary period.'
Pass the parcel...