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"I will personally take over after Watson, who previously managed your now very small portfolio!"
"I told you everyone would come as a bull or a bear..."
Department of Unrealistic Dividend Earnings: 'We realize it is an unnecessary department but the acronym was just too cool to shut it down.'
'I'm worried - she insisted on closing every one of her accounts while she waited...'
Bewildered, Inc. . . Stocks, bonds, mutual funds.
'Don't jump! The latest market sector bubble to burst is making a turnaround!'
Half a loaf is better than none..