Search by Search ID or Tag or use the Advanced Search
'We're looking for managers that demonstrate high levels of emotional intelligence. Here, please try on this mood ring.'
"I can see from your résumé that you're a man."
Tags:resume, resumes, cv, hr, human resources, personnel, job candidate, job candidates, job applicant, job applicants, job offer, job offers, job interview, job interviews, interview, interviews, work history, work histories, work experience, work experiences, interviewer, interviewers, job skill, job skills
'Among my many talents, not shown on my resume, is that I can say 'multivarient transformative interactive analytical heterogenacity in management leadership' three times fast.'
"Congratulations. You have the skills we're looking for, and you'll just fit a cubicle."
'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'
"The aliens that control my brain really want me to get this job."
"I've been sent home with unemployable-like symptoms."
Tags:symptom, symptoms, unemployed, unemployable, sick day, sick days, ill day, ill days, sick leave, sick leaves, cv, resume, resumes, hr, human resources, personnel, job skill, job skills, skill set, skill sets, employment skill, employment skills, symptom, symptoms, worker, workers, laid off, lay-off, lay off, layoff, layoffs, laid-off, redundancy, redundancies, job seeker, job seekers, job hunter, job hunters, job hunting, jobless, joblessness
'Oh I can be reliable and for an extra three hundred a week, I can be efficient too.'
Advertising and PR Agency: 'I'm able to spin at 60 words per minute, hype at 50 words and distort at 45 words.'
"We need someone with experience operating a wrecking ball. Huffing and puffing and blowing buildings down is pretty much an outdated skill these days."
Tags:wolf, wolves, demolition company, demolition companies, job skill, job skills, cv, cvs, resume, resumes, fairy tale, fairy tales, fairytale, fairytales, fairy story, fairy stories, villain, villains, big bad wolf, demolition crew, demolition crews, three little pigs, job interview, job interviews, hr, human resources
Richard was ahighly skilled salesman with an impressive track record of success.
". . .And are you a good listener?"
"I'm sorry, but you're over-qualified."
'It just never dawned on me that one of his super powers was supervising."
Tags:superheroes, superhero, super hero, super heroes, hero, superpower, superpowers, super power, super powers, heroes, comic books, comics, supervisors, hr, work, boss, bosses, supervision, coworkers, office work, corporate, company, management, managers, office manager, desk work, cubicles, job skill, job skills
"Top marks in most of his exams and he still needs help putting on his underwear properly!"
Tags:qualification, qualifications, o levels, a levels, test, tests, resume, resumes, cv, cvs, skill set, skill sets, work skill, job skill, job skills, higher education, gcse, gcses, exam, exams, examination, examinations, child, children, teenager, student, students, degree, degrees, diploma, diplomas
"He's a psychopath...I like that in a man!"
"So when it comes to selecting staff these are the qualities I'm looking for!"
"As an MP I'm not sure what kind of work the Government thinks that unskilled, untrained and unqualified, unemployed people can do in their 'Return to Work' scheme!"
"He's working out well for the copycat position."
'Your performance review is in...and it's not good.'
Tags:lifeguard, lifeguards, performance review, performance reviews, appraisal, appraisals, performance, performances, grim, grims, reaper, reapers, grim reaper, grim reapers, angel of death, beach, beaches, vacation, vacations, job skill, job skills, sea rescue, coast guard, lifeguard station, drowning, sea rescues, drown, drowns
"I did have a question regarding your career history. Under 'Strengths,' you listed 'Never convicted.' Would you mind elaborating on that?"
Tags:hr, human resources, personnel, job candidate, job candidates, job applicant, job applicants, cv, cvs, resume, resumes, conviction, convictions, criminal conviction, criminal convictions, criminal record, criminal records, career, careers, job interview, job interviews, career, careers, job skill, job skills
"I'm just not sure you're capable for a position here."
"Well I think I'm good at bureaucratic mismanagement but my particular strength is in interfering in things I know nothing about!"
"More ruddy training. . . As if I haven't got enough to do!"
Tags:bureaucracy, bureaucracies, bureaucrat, bureaucrats, paper pusher, paper pushers, paper-pusher, paper-pushers, job skill, job skills, job training, on the job training, skill set, skill sets, workload, workloads, overworked, overwork, overworks, leadership skills, management skill, management skills, management training, manager training, extra training
"...I think you might be great for our management position."
Tags:hr, human resources, personnel, job candidate, job candidates, job applicant, job applicants, traffic light, traffic lights, job skill, job skills, skill set, skill sets, skill-set, skill-sets, resume, resumes, cv, cvs, manager, managers, management, managements, management skill, management skills, job offer, job offers