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'...then I said, 'give me a raise, or I quit'.'
'Organ donor. Any other talents?'
"I'm looking for one of those jobs where actual work is optional."
"Any talents besides tasting good?"
'Currently I'm an alternative journalist.'
'Sorry Mr Platypus, but we have little need for a swimming-instructor around here...'
'I can't keep up with technology either.'
'The main requirements for this job are the ability to live without money, skilled at mind numbing work and getting along with disgruntled coworkers.'
'My master insists I become a working dog.'
Don't you remember? I'm the guy you replaced
'Job centre' 'Work Simulator'
'Job centre' doorway as a machine for washing humans
"Sorry, still no openings for a professional 'Clapper.'"
"I went down to the state unemployment office like you said, Dad. I explained that I had no skills, no experience and no actual desire to work...I start working there Monday! They said I'd be perfect!"