Employment History Cartoons and Comics

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"I wish I had read your resume before we got married."

"According to your resumé, Jack, you're all work and no play. We like that."

'How long did you work in subliminal advertising?' - 'A split second.'

"You've been chewed up and spitout by some very prestigious firms."

"I'm shocked! he had a resumé as long as your arm."

'Nobody has seen as many employees and CEOs coming and going as you have, Higgins. How long have you worked here now?'

"My most recent position was under a house."

'Okay, that's enough of your work history.'

'Do you have any employers references?'

"By and large this is a fine resumé. Tell me about the year in the loony bin."

"For those missing years, I refer you to my book 'Lost in Tanzania.'"

"Sorry, but your good references don't match the passion of your bad ones."

"Do you have any experience as anything other than an innocent bystander?"

'Well true to my word, here's your reference.'

"Your resume says SOB, tell me more about that."

"Just when did you leave your last job?"

'I'll stop saying you've changed jobs too many times if you'll stop giving me notice.'

'That's funny - all of your employers that I called are now out of business.'

'In my last job I had 40 people under me. I was a grave digger.'

'Why did you leave your previous place?'

'I notice you previous five employers all spelt 'dillegent' incorrectly.'

'I don't care how much you interfaced, interacted, coordinated, arranged, or organized in the past. Just tell me how many prenups you've worked on.'

'Present employment?'

'During the three-year gap in my employment history I was working on my marriage.'