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"I've stopped looking for work, which, I believe, helps the economic numbers."
Tags:unemployed, unemployment, unemployment figures, looking for work, job hunting, job hunt, job hunts, looking for jobs, job search, job searching, job seeker, job seekers, job seeking, massaging the figures, out of employment figures, data, data manipulation, economic figures, economic numbers, unemplyment numbers, given up, give up
"Two English-speaking people to do cooking and all housework on South Carolina plantation October through May. References required. Must like dogs."
Tags:job candidate, job candidates, job applicant, job applicants, job application, job applications, candidate, candidates, job seeker, job seekers, job seeking, job hunter, job hunters, job hunting, job hunt, job hunts, servant, servants, housework, household, households, domestic, domestics, worker, workers, domestic worker, domestic workers
"I know you're a working dog, Angus. I just don't have anything for you right now."
"Get in there, get on your ass & find a job!"
Tags:couple, couples, marriage, marriage, married couple, married couples, unemployed, unemployment, find a job, job-hunt, job-hunting, job hunt, job hunting, jobs, job, lazy, lethargic, careless, indifferent, indifference, money, dilly dally, dilly dallying, dallying, trifling, find, finds, finding, found, look, looks, looking, looked, hunt, hunted, hunting, hunts
"Qualifications? Hello! I've only spent the last six years running a huge multinational ferris wheel."
Day one, post grad
Tags:postgrad, postgraduate, postgraduates, undergraduate, undergraduates, undergrad, graduate, graduates, new grads, grads, new graduate, new graduates, graduation, graduated, education, college, colleges, university, universities, bachelors, masters, ma, mba, phd, doctorate, doctorates, degree, degrees, job, jobs, work, career, careers, profession, professions, real world, employment, job search, job hunt, job hunting, looking for a job, after graduation, recruit, recruitment
Men Looking for Work
Tags:men at work, sign, signs, executive, executives, business executive, business executives, construction, construction sign, construction signs, road sign, road signs, job hunt, job hunts, job hunting, look for work, looking for work, unemployed, unemployment, unemployment line, unemployment lines, recession, recessions, economic recession, economic recessions
"Are you willing to work the night shift?"
'It says here you like to push the envelope.'
'...the job is so much harder when you don't know what you are doing.'
'Thanks for coming in. We'll get back to you as soon as we lower our expectations.'
'We'd love to help out. Any issue with us being illegal aliens?'
"I'm sorry, but I can't hire you. I typed your name in on a search engine, and lazy, selfish, and unmotivated were the categories that came up."
'We have an opening for a receptionist and a sales person and I'm ready to quit. How are you at multitasking?'
"I'd like to make $3.2 million a year, but I'll settle for $8 an hour."
The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Gets A Job
Tags:comic book, comic books, comic, comics, narrative, narratives, quack quack, duck, ducks, diary, diaries, journal, journals, childrens book, children's book, childrens books, children's books, satire, satires, satirical, pseudo, weep, weeps, cry, cries, job hunt, job hunts, job hunting, fire, fired
'I exaggerated on my resume and I was still underqualified.'
"Mr. Kennings was going to interview you for the job, until he heard you actually wanted to get paid."
"Thanks for the 'Good luck on your new job search' card. Bust I wasn't aware I was looking for a new job."
We're trying a new interview technique. It's called "laddering".
Tags:ladder, ladders, interview, interviews, interviewing, interviewer, interviewers, intimidate, intimidates, intimidation, technique, techniques, daunt, daunting, daunted, nerve, nervous, nervousness, job interview, job interviews, job interviewer, job interviewers, job hunt, job hunts, job hunting, new technique, new techniques
"So, let me get this right. All the job involves is running around a track as fast as I can?"
Tags:rabbit, hare, greyhound, greyhound racing, dog, dog racing, greyhound track, interview, job interview, candidate, job description, unfair, dishonest, hr, human resources, job search, job hunt, inadequate, unprepared, lie, lying, boss, employer, employee, employees, greyhounds, dog, dogs, canine, canines
"That's it, deep fried or mashed. Do you want a job or not?"
Tags:potato, potatoes, spud, spuds, job, jobs, job centre, job center, job centers, interview, interviews, interviewer, interviewee, cooking, cook, cooked, technique, techniques, method, methods, indecisive, indecisiveness, job hunt, job hunting, hesitant, hesitance, mash, mashed, deep fry, deep fat fry, deep frying, recruit, recruiting, options, limited options, choice, limited choice, unhealthy
"So you wouldn't be interrupted while interviewing me, I took the liberty of calling in a bomb threat."
Opp'y of a Lifetime
"I can start Monday - but I'll need to leave early. I have another job interview that day at 3:15."