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The grass is always greener on TV.
"Wake up, Larry - you're missing the pregame."
"Do I belive in ESP...I thought you siad ESPN."
"Sometimes I think all this post game analysis has gone too far."
'What are you watching? . . . I swear I can see you brow lowering and your brain getting smaller from here.'
"Chivalry actually isn't dead. It's on life support being fed by the sports channels."
'We interrupt our regular programming to bring you the football season....'