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'It's a bird, it's a plane...it's superman! Oh brother, a bird and a plane aren't even close to the same size...I really need some new glasses.'
'You really need glasses, dear. You're starting to annoy me.'
"Well looks like it's time for eye glasses."
'Have you ever thought of trying contact lenses?'
'I'd like to buy a vowel.'
Tags:old man, old men, getting old, getting older, sight loss, loss of sight, glasses, spec, specs, spectacles, spectacle, purchase, purchases, purchasing, purchased, vowel, vowels, eye test, tests, test, eye, eyes, mistake, mistaken, mistakes, doctor, doctors, eye doctor, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"I'm sick of writing book reports on spec."
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, education, school, schools, schooling, teaching, learning, teacher, teachers, student, students, homework, assignment, assignments, project, projects, book report, book reports, upset, sick, tired, bored, annoyed, spec, reading, book, books, literature, english, writing
Closing Laugh Optician
'I don't wear glasses. These are solar panels that keep my phone charged.'
"Kids at school call us 'eight eyes'."
Tags:play on words, word play, word-play, redux, remix, invert, inverted, subvert, subverted, four eyes, glasses, spec, specs, kid, kids, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, motherhood, mothers, parent, parents, parenting, bullying, child, bullies, bullied, tease, teasing, name calling, name-calling, mean, schadenfreude, two heads, two headed, missing the obvious, invert, inverted, classic
'Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?' - 'It wouldn't help. I've left my glasses at home.'
Tags:spec, on spec, built on spec, church, churches, lease, leases, leasing, customize, customizable, customise, customisable, religious faith, tailor, tailored, tailored to you, tailored for you, faith, faithful, religious faith, corrupt, corrupts, corrupting, corrupting influence, corrupting influence, prosper, prospers, prospering, prosperity, billboard, billboards, clergy, sell, sells, selling, spiritual, spirituality
Forget about seeing the forest, or even the trees...right now Doug was far from that space!!
'Those aren't sunspots, dummy - Your glasses are dirty again!'
Tags:astronomer, astronomers, observatory, observatories, stargazer, stargazers, stargazing, star-gazing, star-gazer, star-gazers, spec, spectacles, eyesight, astronomy, telescope, telescopic, sun, sunspots, sky, stars, universe, galaxy, glasses, smudges, smudged, lens, lenses, human error, invalid results, peer review, scientific results
'Of course I know how to read the water, but I my glasses fell overboard.'
Tags:boat, boats, sailor, sailors, optician, opticians, eyesight, reading the water, spec, specs, spectacles, boating accident, boating accidents, rapid, rapids, sinking ship, sinking ships, ship, ships, boating, boater, boaters, glasses, eyes, optometry, optometrist, optometrists, ophthalmology, ophthalmologist, ophthalmologists
'Hey, way to go, Sid! New horn rims!'
'Try these. They'll stylishly announce your return to the idealism of your youth without any apologies for being a total sell-out during the past few decades!'
People had tried to tell Delbert that flying may not be for him.
'Well, it looks like you need trifocals!'
'This is our concept of how people will eventually adapt to all the wider screens.'
'So that's where I left my glasses!'
'Yes, I've been working with bees for a long time. Why do you ask?'
'So that's where I left my glasses!'
'They might look sexy and seductive but all I want to do is the crossword.'