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"You're the one who should be 'Time's' man of the year."
"Humor should be employed to defuse tension, not create it."
"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."
"If you don't hurry up, you're never going to be the first openly gay anything."
"What's a traditional family?"
"The only ghosts you need fear are the ghosts of your past—which will gnaw away at your soul, riddle you with self-doubt, and ultimately sap you of your will to live."
"If you bring joy and enthusiasm to everything you do, people will think you're crazy."
'Better bring the pot back over here, Mom - Dad's still down a few cups.'