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'Come in Justin, I just finished marking your exam.' - Grade Scale
"In a multiple choice exam if in doubt always go for D, because that's about what grade you'll end up with!"
'I would probably do a lot better if you would just teach me stuff I already know.'
'Reading this grant proposal, I conclude that you must have gotten an A in creative writing.'
'Don't sweat it - We grade on the curve.'
"You made it in thanks to the bell curve."