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Salesman to computer buyer: 'It's a very user-friendly model.'
"Look, I'm really having trouble with my computer. I need it to work and I need it now...and your fancy schmancy jargon isn't helping much."
"You've been waiting to get on all morning? Let me guess... You figured out how to set the automatic backups... But you've yet to figure out why there's an 'AM' and a 'PM' selection?"