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Playfully skirting catastrophic failure since 1924
"At Morgan Stanley, Ms. Brimworth, we do not shout 'Bingo!'"
Remembers: Elevators can go down as well as up.
'That's a statue of my rich uncle.'
"Release our vaults from these thy vises, We've done our time in Hell; And lead us out these endless crises Of the troubled S. & L.s."
Tags:savings and loan, savings and loans, savings and loans scandal, savings and loans scandals, savings and loans cris, s&l, s&l scandal, s&l scandals, s & l, banker, bankers, banking, big bank, big banks, slush fund, slush funds, 80s, 90s, nineties, eighties, salesperson, salespeople, salesman, salesmen, poet, poets, poetry, investor, investors, investment bank, investment banks, investment banking, poem, poems, writer, writers, writing, author, authors
'Social work is such a worthwhile, fulfilling career that I've decided to give up my fabulous income as an investment banker to become one!'
"I had street smarts but they weren't wall street smarts."
Current Yields: Ask About Our Daily Specials.
"Leverage', by Goldman, Sachs."
Tags:perfume, perfumes, golddigger, golddiggers, gold digger, gold diggers, leverage, financial leverage, bank, banks, banker, bankers, investment banking, investment banker, investment bankers, investment bank, investment banks, investment management, investor, investors, seduction, seductions, seductress
'Here at First Infidelity we've always been forward thinking investors. We've invested in penny stocks before they were penny stocks.'
"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."
Tags:finance, banks, bankers, banking, loans, money, credit crunch, recession, recessions, stock, stocks, share, shares, stocks and shares, lending, risk, funfairs, thrill ride, thrill rides, fun dair, fun fairs, funfair, thrill, ride, investment bank, investment banks, investment banker, investment bankers, investor, investors
The Wall Street Tattler
Tags:news, newspaper, newspapers, paper, papers, tabloid, tabloids, finance, financial, financial news, wall street, investment, investments, investment bank, investment banking, investment banker, investment bankser, sstocks and shares, stock trading, stock trader, stock traders, tattler, tattlers, gossip, gossips, gossiping, gossipers, gossiper
"I will personally take over after Watson, who previously managed your now very small portfolio!"
Tags:investment, investment company, investments, investment companies, portfolios, financial adviser, financial advisers, bankrupt, stressful job, stressful jobs, portfolio, shares, bank, investment bank, money, loss, bankruptcy, death, banker, investment manager, trust fund, bankrupt, client, customer
WARNING - Thieves Operate in this Area.
The Next to Last National Bank, Successfully Losing Money for Over 200 Years.
'You mean we've been doing all this with OTHER PEOPLES' MONEY!'
'Look at all those little people down there Miss Jones. If it wasn't for them I'd have to be reckless with my own money.'
'Yes, it went from 100 to 2, which is down 98%, but then it went from 2 to 4, which is up 100%, so you're ahead.'
'I used to be an investment banker...but I am alright now.'
'So, anyone have any idea how we go about explaining how we made a hostile takeover bid for one of our own subsidiaries?'
Banker's decide to 'waive' their bonus cheques!
"Let's have a moment's silence to remember the profits we used to make."
Tags:credit crunch, financial crisis, credit crisis, banking crisis, banker, bankers, bank, banks, financial sector, banking sector, banking sectors, profit, profits, investment bank, investment banks, stock markets, stock exchange, crash, investment, investments, economic downturn, economic downturns
'The National Debt just sounds like it's a lot of money because it's such a large number.'
"The investment banking division has 500 employees, including 499 compliance officers."
"We can't all work for Goldman Sachs."