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The Endless Tunnel of Love
"Would it be too much to ask to get a DSL in here?"
"We already changed our phone service to something or other last week, so we don't need whatever it is you have."
"Hello. This is Dial-a-Grump. What the hell do you want?"
"The time is now 7:42 - and if you can hang on for half a sec, I'll witch you over to Phil with the weather."
"Let's skip Earth - they have crappy Wi-Fi."
'You've reached Human Resources automated phone service...'
Shouldn't the hotline have a connection to dial-a-prayer?
'We have plenty of electricity and great phone service but still no rain.'
'What? No cell service?'
'The department finally found a phone service that actually works in the dead zones in the county.'
'Phone Services - Desperate Selling to Small Businesses'
NHS Direct "Take two asprin. If symptoms persist call a minister"
"I'm not swimming upstream! There are bears there, but even worse, there's no Wi-Fi or phone signal."