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"Oh, there's nothing really wrong with our marriage. We'd just like to figure out a way to monetize it."
Tags:divorce, marriage, monetize, money, counsellor, monetizes, monetizing, monetise, monetises, monetising, divorcing, make money, makes money, making money, modern life, modern times, modern marriage, modern marriages, bottom line, bottom lines, marriage problem, marriage problems, money problem, money problems, monetary problem, monetary problems, mankoff
"Look, all I'm asking is that we let market forces bring a greater degree of efficiency into our marriage."
Tags:market, wall street, market forces, efficiency, free market, free markets, marriage problem, marriage problems, capitalist, capitalists, capitalism, inefficient, marriages, marriage trouble, marriage troubles, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, efficient, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, cut costs, cutting costs, modern marriage, modern marriages, mankoff
"I'm rich, you're thin. Together, we're perfect."
Tags:superficial, superficiality, modern life, modern marriage, modern marriage, compatible, compatibility, couple, couples, good couple, good couples, suitable, suitability, rich person, rich people, thin, priority, priorities, perfect couple, perfect couples, honest, honesty, frank, frankness, direct, proposal, proposals, proposing
"Rachel bought herself a Porsche, so I got my boobs done."
Tags:sports car, sports cars, stereotype, stereotypes, gender stereotype, gender stereotypes, battles of the sexes, sexes, balance of power, marriage, modern marriage, modern marriages, modern life, modern times, equality, equal rights, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeons, plastic surgery, cosmetic surgeon, cosmetic surgeons, cosmetic surgery
"And, for music, you want traditional or new age?"
Tags:relationship, relationships, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, bride, brides, groom, grooms, getting married, wedding, weddings, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies, marriage ceremony, marriage ceremonies, machine, machines, technology, music, wedding music, new age, traditional, modern weddings, modern marriage, convenient, 24-hour, 24 hour, quick, instant, immediate, wedding planning, vegas wedding, wedding chapel, wedding chapels, modern, modern life
"Look, hon, I know both of our schedules have been crazy, but I still think we should take time out to consummate our marriage."
Tags:relationships, marriage, men, women, business, management, sexless, sexless marriage, sexless marriages, unhappy marriage, unhappy marriages, unhappily married, crazy schedule, crazy schedules, consummate, consummates, consummating, honeymoon, honeymoons, working marriage, working marriages, modern marriage, modern marriages, mankoff
"Good news, hon - I've sold the ancillary rights to our marriage."
Tags:marriage, modern life, selling, divorce, divorces, right, rights, ancillary right, ancillary rights, sell the rights, selling the rights, modern marriage, modern marriages, modern family, modern families, monetize, monetizes, montezing, monetise, monetises, monetising, reality show, reality shows, sell the rights, sells the rights, selling the rights, mankoff
"We divided it up so I do everything right and he does everything wrong."
Tags:always right, never right, husbands and wives, wife, wives, fishwife, husband, husbands, married life, marriage, unhappy marriage, unhappy, unhealthy, bad, relationship, divided, dividing, divvied, bias, biased, women, woman, modern marriage, spoof, spoofed, spoofs, unlikely, cell, cell phone, phone, phones, phone call, call, calls, called
"Do you, Ashley, take Nesbitt and his genome to be your husband?"
Tags:relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, wedding, weddings, bride, brides, groom, grooms, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies, wedding vow, wedding vows, vow, vows, science, biology, genetics, gene, genes, genome, genomes, reproduction, kid, kids, child, children, fertility, dna, d.n.a., modern life, modern marriage, modern marriages, genetic testing, genetic test, genetic tests
Modern relationships on mailboxes.
Tags:divorced, divorce, divorce culture, marriage, modern marriage, modern marriages, single mom, single moms, joint custody, blended family, blended families, issue, issues, working on issues, modern relationships, modern life, modern family, modern families, visitation, visitation rights, broken home, broken homes, mailbox, mailboxes, address, addresses
Tags:relationships, problems, marriage, psychology, prison, prisons, analogy, analogies, domestic life, suburban life, suburb, suburbs, minimum security, prisoner, prisoners, analogy, analogies, modern life, modern marriage, modern marriages, bored, boring, boring life, boring lives, jail, jails, jailed, antiseptic life, dull, dullness, dull life, dull lives, uninterested, uninteresting, mankoff
"Women want more these days, Bill - it's not enough just to be a jerk anymore."
Tags:men, relationships, romance, modern romance, modern life, modern marriage, feminist, feminists, feminism, entitled, entitlement, male entitlement, jerk, jerks, attract, attracts, attracting women, attract women, attracts women, churlish, standoffish, pickup, pickups, picking up women, modern women, raised expectations, raising your expectations, dating life, single life, single lives, mankoff
"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."
Tags:wedding, weddings, modern life, modern marriage, modern marriages, romance, lack of romance, unromantic, drop down menu, drop down menus, online, online relationship, online relationships, wife, wives, online option, online options, millennial, millennials, millennial generation, millennial generations, millennial marriage, millennial marriages
"I just realized, Howard, that everything in this apartment is more sophisticated than we are."
Tags:technology, home entertainment, home entertainment system, home entertainment systems, entertainment system, entertainment systems, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, modern life, modern times, flatscreen, flatscreens, flat screen, flat screens, useless, sophisticate, sophisticates, sophistication, sophisticated, technology, technologies, modern life, modern times, electronics, electronic equipment, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, modern marriage, modern marriages, apartment, apartments, flat, flats
Fantastic, fit, fortysomething exec, interested in culture, athletic pursuits, and gourmet food, seeks intelligent, dynamic, thirtysomething beauty for evolving relationship leading marriage.
"We have an arrangement."
Tags:dominant, dominance, submissive, d/s, relationship, relationships, sexuality, alternative sexuality, alternative sexualities, kinkster, kinksters, arrangement, arrangements, alternative, marriage, marriages, modern marriage, modern marriages, modern life, stockade, stockades, torture, tortures, torture device, torture devices
"I used to have a Paul Newman role in our marriage, but now I'm taking the Harry Dean Stanton part."
Tags:submissive, sub, subs, submissive role, submissive roles, dominant, dominance, power struggle, power struggles, marriage, marriages, modern marriage, modern marriages, emasculate, emasculates, emasculating, emasculation, role, roles, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, paul newman, harry dean stanton, control, weak, weakness, authority, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses
Spark Notes Wedding Vows
Tags:summary, summaries, sum up, sums up, summing up, spark notes, vow, vows, marriage vow, marriage vows, honest, honesty, truthful, truthfulness, cynic, cynics, cynical, marriage, marriages, wedding, weddings, wedding vow, wedding vows, brevity, pithy, brutal, brutally honest, brutal honesty, tolerate, tolerates, tolerating, modern life, modern marriage, modern marriages, monogamy, monogamous
"Steve and I live together, but we're getting indicted separately."
Tags:live together, lives together, living together, indict, indicted, indictment, indictments, couple, couples, counselor, counselors, counseling, counsellor, counsellors, counselling, modern marriage, modern marriages, modern relationship, modern relationships, modern couple, modern couples, legal charge, legal charges, lawsuit, lawsuits, corporate crime, corporate criminal, corporate criminals
"And do you, Stephanie, promise to love, honor and 'obey'?
Tags:marriage, married, getting married, getting hitched, wedding, weddings, wedding day, wedding vow, wedding vows, love honor and obey, love honour and obey, traditional wedding vows, old-fashioned wedding vows, old fashioned vows, outdated views, outdated vows, outdated wedding vows, obey, obedient, obedient wife, obedience, patriarchy, patriarchal views, sexism, sexist views, quote marks, quotation marks, irony, ironic, ironic vows, sarcasm, sarcastic vows, modern marriage, irony punctuation
'Don't you just long for a case of good old sexual transgression rather than inappropriate blogs,tweets and chats ?'
"I just sent a penny to your bank account for your thoughts."
Tags:penny for your thoughts, expression, expressions, idiom, idioms, depression, depressed, mental health, mental state, communicate, communicates, communicating, communication, communications, mobile, mobiles, cell, cells, phone, phones, smartphone, smartphones, mobile, modern, modern marriage, modern families, modern relationships
'Of course we have a communication problem, that last LOL was ironic.'
"She's just waiting for him to be worth divorcing."
Tags:divorce, divorces, divorcing, gold digger, gold diggers, gold digging, wait, waits, waiting, settlement, settlements, divorce settlement, divorce settlements, bad marriage, bad marriages, married life, married lives, modern marriage, modern marriages, marry for money, marries for money, marrying for money, divorce proceedings, money grubber, money grubbers, money-grubbing, wife, wives, husband, husbands, ex-husband, ex-husbands, payday, paydays, windfall, windfalls, financial windfall, financial windfalls, spouse, spouses
"Dennis, I would like to talk to you for a minute-off-line."
Tags:conversation, conversations, offline, instant message, instant messages, instant messaging, text, texts, text message, text messages, text messaging, texting, talk, talks, talking, internet addiction, internet addict, internet addicts, smart device, smart devices, communication, communication problem, communication problems, modern marriage, modern marriages, home office, home offices, working from home, workaholic, workaholics