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Woodworkers Club Meeting, Room 23. Splinter Group, Room 24.
"Never mind the splinters, Hal. If this works, we'll be legends!"
'It's very 'woody'...'
Types of Wood
'Mom, I got a sliver.' 'Don't worry. I'll just heat a needle over a match and dig it out.' 'Don't take this the wrong way, but are you related to Vlad the Impaler?'
'That inflammation's caused by splinters, Mr, Jenkins, I'd recommend switching to a diet of softer woods - say, pine or cedar,'
Tags:beaver, beavers, wood, woods, pine, pines, cedar, cedars, tree, trees, eat, eats, chew, chews, chewing, eating, diet, diets, doctor, doctors, splint, splints, splinter, splinters, inflammation, inflamed, throat, throats, mouth, mouths, teeth, tooth, soft, softer, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
'What's really amazing is that you can still see the dust in everybody else's eye so clearly.'
"Let me guess: Another splinter?"
'Remember, I deduct one grade point for every splinter.'
'If this keeps up, we'll soon be a splinter organization.'
'I just got a splinter from your rescue boat! Expect to hear from my lawyer, as soon as we get back to civilization.'
'How about I leave the last splinter in? It'll be a good reminder to not take things literally, at your next barrel tasting.'
"I know that you only came in with a splinter, but you shouldn't have fallen off the trolley!"
No! I can't see a splinter!!
'This certainly is a quick way of removing steel splinters, doctor!'
It started as a splinter two weeks ago!
'Opportunity knocked on my door once, got a splinter, and sued me for every cent I had!'
'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'
'He got a splinter from his scratching post.'
"Hmm, that's some splinter, Smith...I suppose you should take the afternoon off..."
Tags:splinter, splinters, accidents, health & safety, office managers, bosses, managers, compassionate leave, sick leave, accident, health and safety, office manager, manager, boss, line manager, compassion, going home sick, sick-leave, absence from work, employment, wounded, take afternoon off, generous, office politics, work ethic, slave labour, brain injury, laceration, spike