Consultants Cartoons and Comics

"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."

'He decided to celebrate meeting his QOF targets by doing a cartwheel...wrecked his knee and has to wait 26 weeks to see a consultant.'

"How about one of those sunny old grandpas who make things look honest?"

Al's punditry barn

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Office Canteen: 'Getting in a consultant is win-win for us... we'll get the credit if it's a success - but, if it all goes wrong, we've got someone else to blame!'

'We're expecting stocks to rally but we don't know which ones and when.'

Health MOT's will attract 'worried well'

'I've looked up my symptoms on the internet and I've either got...'

Doctor Sponsored by Pharmaceutical Companies

"How do we know it's not full of consultants?"

Help! Sold Derivatives when I didn't even know what they were.

'Your spider veins are not the largest I have ever seen, but they are varicose.'

"Mr. Sherman, you hired our team of management consultants to stremline your enterprise, and that is precisely what we are doing."

Imitate me, formerly 'Think'.

"You know, you're got something there, Spikey -- the Lone Ranger was a sort of consultant."

'Your medical problems are more complicated than I thought. I am going to refer you to another doctor, who has more medical insurance than I have.'

'We're going to be experiencing some pain today. We're removing the band-aid we put on the problem.'

"Jump!" Performance management.

"He retired as an executive, returned as a contractor, became a consultant and now he's a brooding presence."

'Of course, we're fully prepared to offer you our comprehensive employee health care package.'

'Here's another rock...you'll find your 'hard place' over there.'

"We want to warn you that the candidate's comments have yet to be spun, so you may have to formulate your own opinion."

'After looking at your test results and consulting many experts, it's my medical opinion that you have something I can't pronounce.'

'I don't care what the TSA guy at the airport told you, it's not cancerous.'