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'Tell me more about this 6-week plan you tried.'
"We should reload the changer. The Franklins are coming at seven."
'If they're energy saving lightbulbs, how come I have to use my energy to change one?'
Dave's diaper-changing incentive chart.
'I've been able to change their answer from 'never' to 'when pigs fly'.'
'You know, you shouldn't make the evolutionary jump from water to land until an hour after you eat.'
'I don't mind players entering the NBA at an early age. It's the diaper changes that I hate.'
'This is the third time we've restructured and just realized we're back where we started.'