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'Rather than learning how to solve that, shouldn't I be learning how to operate software that can solve that?'
"Have you tried turning yourself off, then turning yourself on again?"
'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'
Under new management. But still no bananas.
"Anybody know where I can get a piece of ash?"
"It hurts when I try to nap on the hardware, that's why I prefer software."
'Which came first: the hardware or the software?'
'Here's your problem. The software was manufactured in November and your computer was manufactured in February. Sagittarius is incompatible with Aquarius.'
'All the rest can scroll to Leviticus on your Bible software...'
"Do you have anything in a smaller size?"