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"We'd like you to be the quirky but lovable teen-age daughter,"
"I couldn't believe it either, but Heaven really is a dumbed-down book fair."
'How come people in soap opera never waste their time watching soap operas?'
'I'm living in a soap opera!'
'Your Honor, my client developed situational ethics because his parents allowed him to watch too many situation comedies.'
Supermarket canned laughter.
"This isn't a marriage...It's a situation comedy"