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'Uh, help me out Jenkins. It seems we're out of toilet paper.' 'Didn't you get the email, Haversham? Our office has gone paperless.'
'Yes Sir, you're absolutely right, you can never stop learning - in fact I'm on a course right now.'
Pay me or I'll vote for Nader
Tags:nader, ralph nader, al gore, george bush, bush, george w. bush, president, presidents, presidential, campaign, campaigns, election, elections, electoral, general election, general elections, green, greens, green party, threat, threatening, beg, begging, panhandle, panhandling, insult, insulting
"I hated how they acted so much 'greener than thou'."
Tags:environmentalism, environmental issues, environmentalist, environmentalists, going green, green, environmentally friendly, ecologically responsible, ecological, ecologic, natural resources, nature, natural, naturalist, naturalists, outdoors, outdoor enthusiasts, outdoor enthusiast, husband, wife, husbands, wives, couple, couples, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, spouse, spouses, boyfriend, boyfriends, girlfriends, hippy, hippies, liberal, liberals, tree hugger, tree huggers, left wing, pretentious, holier than thou
"It's a pity those awful people were right about the environment."
Tags:environment, environmental, environmentalist, environmentalists, environmentalism, barren, wasteland, wastelands, global warming, climate change, word play, play on words, baby boomer, baby boomers, nature, green, recycle, recycling, greenhouse gases, carbon, carbon footprint, green house gases, greenhouse effect, carbon emissions, emissions, extinction event, extinction, extinct, critic, critical, critique, critics, critically
'You just had to put in fifteen hundred acres of corn when you know darn well all my casseroles call for green beans.'
Tags:farm, farms, farming, farmer, farmers, farmed, acre, acres, corn, corns, sweetcorn, sweet corn, plant, planted, plants, planting, planter, planters, green beans, green, greens, beans, bean, pea, peas, casserole, casseroles, wife, wives, bad cook, cook, cooking, cooker, cookers, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'I heard riding the bus was better for the environment so I bought us each one!'
"Wait - use a knife. It's greener."
Tags:green, green lifestyle, green lifestyles, green energy, conserve, conserves, conserving, conservation, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, murdering, execution, executions, hit, hits, mafia, gangster, gangsters, gang, gangs, mobster, mobsters, mob, organized crime, organised crime, responsibility, recycle, recycles, recycling, conscientious, conscientiousness, stab, stabs, stabbing, stabbings
"I cook everything with an alternative energy source, so it may take a while."
Tags:bar, bars, bar food, bar fly, bar flies, diner, diners, foodie, foodies, food lover, food lovers, sustainable, sustainability, alternative energy, alternative energies, alternative energy source, eating out, out to eat, green, eco, eco friendly, eco-friendly, cook, cooking, chef, chefs, turbine, turbines, environment, environmental, environmentally friendly, environmentalism, environmentalist, climate change, global warming, patient, patience, modern life, modern world
Don Quixote attacks wind farm
An Eskimo ice fishing on a golf course.
'Mom! Tyler's playing video games on the smart thermostat again!'
Motivation for children to eat their vegetables.
The Dangers of Golf.
Hilbert got an energy star certification for his energy efficiency.
'Cured? Well, I'll know more once the stitches are removed and the swelling goes down. But I'm fairly certain we've at least improved your defective golf swing.'
"That's so last summer."
Tags:summer, summertime, sun, sunshine, beach, beaches, swim, swimming, swimmer, bathing suit, swim trunks, swimming costume, sunscreen, sunblock, sun cream, spf, sunburn, sunburnt, sun poisoning, solar panels, solar panel, electricity, sunlight, absorb sun, energy, science, scientist, scientists, tanning, tan, tanned, tanning bed, tanning salon, fashion, fashionista, fashionistas, green, green energy, green lifestyle, green lifestyles
"Why do you suppose they call it the green room?"
"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."
Ed Goes Green
Tags:green, green living, green life, go green, goes green, going green, environmentalist, environmentalists, environmentalism, writer, writers, author, authors, conscientious, conscientiousness, social awareness, socially aware, ozone, ozone layer, ozone layers, biodegrade, biodegrades, biodegradable, worry, worries, worrying, modern life, modern times, anxious, anxiety, anxieties, dead trees, ink and paper, book, books, doubt, doubts, self-doubt, self-doubts, self-esteem
"We used your unsold copies to build a tree, but it's not the same."
Tags:tree, trees, book, books, literature, paper, papers, unsold, unsold copy, unsold copies, writer, writers, author, authors, publisher, publishers, conservation, conservation effort, conservation efforts, ecology, recycle, recycling, reuse, reduce, three r's, forest, forests, waste, wasteful, environmentally-friendly, environmentally friendly, environment, ecological, green
'I'm getting an energy credit for installing the solar panels.'
"I'v never actually stormed a castle, but I've taken a bunch of siege-management courses."
"I'm a green thief."
Tags:robberies, robbery, robberies, robber, robbers, thief, thieves, stick-up, stick-ups, hold-up, hold-ups, stickup, stickups, holdup, holdups, mugging, muggings, mugger, muggers, criminal, criminals, street crime, weapon, weapons, crossbow, crossbows, bow, bows, arrow, arrows, bow and arrow, archery, archer, archers, green, alternative, environmentally friendly, going green, eco-friendly, environment, better for the environment, bicycle, bicycles, bike, bikes, get-away, get-away vehicle, get-away vehicles, getaway vehicle, getaway vehicles, get-away vehicle, transportation, green transportation
A golfer walking through the rough sees a sign near the green that reads "Resume counting".