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"Hell: The Airport"
"Can I put in a claim for interview trauma compensation?"
"Of course I'm glad. It's just that I had a bad experience with a boat once."
'I didn't mean it literally when I said I would go through hell to get to Heaven.'
'I just got in touch with my feminine side.'
U. S. POST OFFICE, 'Sorry about the mess, sir -- we're experiencing terrible self-esteem problems today!'