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A man reads the obituary and compares his age to the deceased.
Maynard Wilson - "The Bull Whisperer"
"They say they can figure your longevity by your brain age."
"The nice thing about being a fruit fly is you only have to listen to one news cycle."
"May her soul rest in peace."
"Poor Rosalinda, she always thinks she's dying."
'The good news is you only have the 24 hour bug...the bad news is you're a mayfly.'