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"I want an aisle seat in no smoking, lots of fresh air, proper maintenance, no cracks in the fuselage - and none of your frigging bug spray!"
"Passengers, please note there are no aisles on this flight."
"The aisle seats are reserved for passengers who like to trip other passengers as they go to the restroom."
'Would you prefer a window or an aisle seat?'
Airlines Charge For...Aisle seats, Exit seats, carry-on luggage...