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"What does God do with all that prayer data?"
"You. You. And you."
Tags:heaven, gates of heaven, the gates of heaven, heavens gates, pearly gate, pearly gates, angel, angels, bouncer, bouncers, security, security guards, security guard, crowd, crowds, queue, queues, selection, selection process, club, clubs, clubbing, admitting, admittance, admitted, exclusive, exclusion, elite, the elite, elites, chosen, chose one, the chosen ones, gods chosen ones, god's chosen ones, rope, ropes, barrier, barriers, ped barrier, ped barriers, crowd control, control, controls, controlled, contolling, crowd controlling, crowd controls, crowd controller, christianity, judaism, re teacher, religious education, re, religious studies, rs teacher, rs teachers, re teachers, pick, picking, choose, choosing, discriminate, discrimination, god
'Can you tell me about the dead sea?'
'That 'Jonah' story sounded FISHY to me!'
'Who knocked down the walls of Jericho.'
A girl heads off to school, having climbed out of her tower.
What Pastor Lewis started as a joke, ended up being a vital ministry...
'My Mum said Eve was created second, so us women could always have the last word!'
Cockroach Bible Class: 'And God said 'let there be light'!'
"God must have used an awesome 3-D printer to create this whole world."
Tags:god, 3-d printer, 3d printer, 3d printers, 3-d printers, 3-d printing, 3d printing, re, class, classes, lesson, lessons, creation myth, creation myths, creation story, creation stories, sunday school, teacher, teachers, religious education, creating the world, church, kid, kids, creator, creators
"Guess who has two thumbs and did not waste HIS Sunday morning listening to lies."
Tags:sunday morning, sunday school, lies, church, churches, atheist, atheists, atheism, secular, secularist, religion, religions, religious, christian, christians, christianity, catholic, catholics, god, gods, sunday mornings, sunday schools, religious education, secularists, smug, self-satisfied, lie, lies
In Case Of Fire, Pray! . . . In Case of Prayer, Fire!
Tags:secular society, secular societies, christian society, christian societies, christianity, christian, christians, school, schools, religion in schools, secular, secularism, curriculum, curriculums, education system, schooling, religious education, re, social change, modern society, modern societies
"She tried to explain the difference between spirituality, mindfulness and mysticism. I didn't get it."
'I don't know why other people pray in school, but I pray in school because I'm not supposed to.'
'We may be good eggs, but we're not perfect. We all have a fallen nature.'
"We learned in Sunday School today that God uses illegal surveillance techniques."
Tags:sunday school, sunday schools, god, religious education, surveillance, watch, watches, watching you, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, all-knowing, all-seeing, omniscient, omnipotent, conception of god, conceptions of god, illegal surveillance, illegal surveillance technique, illegal surveillance techniques
"We learned in Sunday School today about how Adam and Eve got downsized!"
Tags:sunday school, religious education, religious ed, religious course, religious courses, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, interpretation, interpretations, interpret, interprets, modern life, modern times, bible, bible story, bible stories, genesis, translate, translates, translations, translation, learn, learns, learning, learnt, learned
"We're in deep trouble... there are some people quoting back to us what we taught them."
That's right Darling, the earth is round and the Great Seal in the Sky is balancing it on its nose...
"What do you mean it's wrong? In ethics we learned the truth is always subjective!"
Tags:the truth, math, maths, lesson, lessons, class, classes, math teacher, math teachers, maths teacher, maths teachers, subjective, ethic, ethics, re, religious education, subjectivity, subjectiveness, truthfulness, truths, religious education, truth, sums, mathematician, mathematicians, pupil, pupils, student, students, classroom, classrooms
Divinity School - Authorized Parsons Only
Tags:parson, parsons, minister, ministers, preacher, preachers, priest, priests, vicar, vicars, divinity school, religious student, religious students, divinity schools, theological seminary, theological seminaries, seminary, seminaries, bible college, bible colleges, bible institute, bible institutes, theology student, religious education, re, r.e.
Today's lesson: the plague of darkness
"Hi, Mom - We learned in school today that ethics and morality are stupid and old-fashioned."
'I was going to teach them the meaning of life ... but it wasn't on the test.'
What are the ethics of teaching ethics in school?