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"When I retire, I promise we'll finally have time to read all the terms and conditions."
Not an Entrance/Not An Exit
Tags:exit, exits, entrance, entrances, logic, logical, illogical, door, doors, entrance door, exit door, exit doors, entrance doors, department, departments, logical thinker, logical thinkers, logical thinking, philosophy, philosophy teacher, philosophy teachers, philosophical, teacher, teachers, logic problem, logic problems, puzzle, puzzles, puzzling, door, doors, logician, lawyer, lawyers, legalese, lawyerese, interpret, interpretation, interpretations, confusing, confusion
"I wouldn't—there's an awful lot of scary-sounding legalese."
'Have I lapsed into legalese?'
"Now, now, Ruffy, if you'll spare me the threats I'll spare you the legal jargon."
'Now...let's have our little talk and avoid a tribunal.'
Jungle of Paragraphs.
"Judge Edelman is taking the chicken livers under advisement, Gertrude; I've decided in favor of the veal; and Judge Hefferman seems to be recusing himself."
Ramon was truly a polished performer...walking backwards up a spiral staircase, blindfolded and totally unassisted, while comparing private health insurance packages!"
Tags:complicated, complicated process, complicated processes, performer, performers, performance, performances, performing, health insurance, health insurance package, health insurance packages, terms, terms and conditions, legalese, lawyerese, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, comparing, walk and chew gum, walking and chewing gum
Lawyer to fellow lawyer: 'Congratulations on your precedent-setting mumbo jumbo!'
"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."
Tags:user agreement, user agreements, data, data collection, data collections, privacy, data privacy, online, online privacy, internet privacy, tech, technology, legal, legal agreements, legal language, legalese, fine print, big data, small print, legal jargon, terms and conditions, contract, contracts, contract law, law, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, barrister, barristers, licenses, licensor, licensors, clause, clauses, boilerplate language, business negotiations, business negotiation, business negotiating, successors and assigns, lawsuit, lawsuits, solicitor, solicitors
"Say, isn't that the guy who used to draft legal documents at our law firm?"
"My loophole out-loopholes your loophole."
'Court is now in recess, Barnes. You can stop talking in legalese.'
"Every time I click 'accept' for these online user agreements, a piece of my soul dies."
"I thought you said there were no fees!"
Tags:gratuity, gratuities, fee, fees, legal language, legalese, lawyerese, technicality, technicalities, mandatory fee, mandatory fees, add-on, add-ons, adding on, price increase, price increases, tip, tips, tipping, no fees, lie, lies, misrepresentation, misrepresentations, misrepresent, misrepresents, misrepresenting
"Yes, Peters, it is just legalese. It's all just legalese. We're a law firm."
"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."
Tags:child, children, baby, babies, infant, infants, newborn, newborns, new baby, new babies, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, new parents, family, families, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, new mothers, new mom, new moms, new mum, new mums, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood, new dad, new dads, new father, new fathers, raising a child, raising children, proud parent, proud parents, life lessons, learn, learning, teach, teaching, language, languages, fluent, fluency, bilingual, law, legalese, legal, lawyer, lawyers, career, careers, job, jobs, profession, professions, dream, dreams, ambition, ambitions, future career, future lawyer, maturity, grow up, growing up, develop, development
"Too wordy...I'm kidding. I just get a kick out of saying that."
"When my parent were kids, they made up alibis. I just carry disclaimers."
'You said you were after a creative tax lawyer.'
'For legalese, press three...'
'That all sounds like waffle and legalese.'
'Before we talk in here, Miss Frobisher will frisk you for any hidden recording device.'
'They agreed to settle out of court.'