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'A little professionalism, people. When asking a patient to undress, we do not giggle.'
'Botched attempt is correct. But can anyone suggest a more family-friendly way of describing what happened?'
"This is a teaching hospital."
'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'
'Correct. And in the case of a cardiac arrest, every second counts. Who can tell me why? Anyone? Clock's ticking.'
"It's OK, this is a teaching hospital. Some people just have to learn that the hard way."
Even medical students sometimes have to repeat a year.
"Hope you don't mind an audience. This is, after all, a teaching hospital."
"You're at a teaching hospital. Hence, all the tests."
'Ok, interns, this elderly female presents with symptoms stemming from drosophila ingestion. Thoughts? Prognosis?'
"It's the hospital board performing surgery on the budget."