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Brush with death vs death with brush
"Will he ever be able to produce revenue again?"
Tags:doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, intensive care, waiting room, waiting rooms, waiting area, medical, medicine, near death, seriously injured, death, family, marriage, married life, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, wife, wives, husband, husbands, income, money, salary, revenue, employment, job, work, career, greed, greedy, selfish, gold digger, gold diggers, good news, bad news
'I'd like a second opinion.'
'To be or not to be - well yes, but what about coma, trance, vegetative states, reincarnation, near death experience, cryogenics?'
Fake Near-death Kit.
Next, I remember looking down at my body, and my kids fighting over the will.
"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."
'You were clinically dead for over a week. Gave us all quite a little scare.'
Stan Has A Near-Death Experience
'Another stupid near-death experience. Try not to take it personally.'
'Dying doesn't scare me - it's you people.'
"If I can crawl, you can circle."
Tags:vulture, bird of prey, vultures, bird of prey, lazy, laziness, inconsiderate, desert, desserts, circling vultures, scavenging, scavengers, scavenging birds of prey, condor, condors, apathetic, apathy, cutting corners, dehydration, dehydrated, lost in the desert, exhausted, exhaustion, crawl, crawling, lost, abandoned, abandonment, stranded, conserving energy, conserve energy, survival, survival techniques, carcass, carcass scavengers, decay, decaying, near death, starving, starvation, waiting for death, carrion, carrion eaters, carrion scavengers, circling, circling birds of prey
'I finally remarried. You've been in a coma for almost three days.'
'... And you say you first noticed them just after you had a 'near death experience'?'
A light...they'd found a light!! But it wasn't the one at the end of the tunnel...
"The aftereffects may include years of insufferably life-affirming pronouncements."
Tags:near death, near death experience, near death experiences, near-death experience, near-death experiences, narrow escape, narrow escapes, nde, ndes, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, in surgery, operation, operations, after effect, after effects, aftereffect, aftereffects, optimist, optimists, optimism, insufferable, positive, positivity, life-affirming, life affirming, irritating
"One of us is in serious trouble!"
'I asked him how he was. His last words were, ‘I'm having the time of my life.' I think he was being sarcastic.'
"Oh, don't mind me..I'm a little early. Just go about your business...pretend I'm not here.
'Knock it off. You're not that sick.'
"Well, there's no need to rub it in."
Tags:mock, mocks, mocked, mockery, mockeries, old age, old-age, old-aged, oldness, ageing, aging, ageing process, aging process, near death, pensioner, pensioners, senior citizen, senior citizens, oap, oaps, antagonize, antagonized, antagonise, antagonised, grump, grumps, grumpy, grumpiness, closing down, closing down sale, closing down sales
'I'm curious about your out-of-body experience. As you floated above your hospital bed, how noticeable was my bald spot?'
'Another failure to communicate?'
'God, if you get me back to shore I'll give you everything I own... How about ten percent plus community work...'