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"I know the doctor said this is only a bad cold, but in case he's mistaken I'd like to hear side eight of 'Der Rosenkavalier' one last time."
"If it's any consolation, toward the end he was high as a kite."
Tags:console, consoles, consolation, consolations, death bed, death beds, high, marijuana, weed, medical marijuana, medical cannabis, morphine, liquid morphine, dark humor, death, dying moment, dying moments, bedside manner, dark humour, high as a kite, cheerful, comforting words, hospice, hospice care, hospice worker, hospice workers, palliative, palliative care
"Ironically, it's sickle cell."
"No, you die first."
Tags:dead, death, dying, die, dies, died, love, loving, romance, romantic, play on words, word play, word-play, deathbed, death bed, last words, last word, dark, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour, phone, phones, conversation, conversations, lovey dovey, lovey-dovey, gushing, gush, girl, girly, twist, twists, twisted, date, dates, dating, things we do for love, doomed love, extreme, extreme feelings, no you, no you hang up
"Hey, Gramps, is 'deathbed' one word or two?"
Tags:grandpa, grandpas, grandfather, grandfathers, deathbed, deathbeds, insensitive, death bed, death beds, spell check, spellcheck, dying, die, dies, dead, hospital, hospitals, teen, teens, teenager, thoughtless, thoughtlessness, carefree, rude, rudeness, tasteless, uncouth, question, questions, cancer, cancers
"My one regret is not napping more."
"It's a standard deathbed confession, Jimmy. Please don't make us drag out the rubber hoses."
Tags:deathbed, deathbeds, death bed, death beds, confess, confesses, confessing, confession, confessions, interrogate, interrogate, interrogating, interrogation, interrogations, homicide, homicides, homicide police, police, policemen, cop, cops, enhanced interrogation, criminal, criminals, tortures, abuse, abuses, abusing, abuser, abusers
"I always lived vicariously. Why can't I die vicariously?"
Tags:living vicariously, lived vicariously, vicarious living, deathbed, deathbeds, death bed, death beds, surrogate, surrogates, surrogacy, deaths, dying, died, die, dies, life choice, life choices, fear of death, thanatophobia, phobia, phobias, avoidance technique, avoidance techniques, avoidance tactic, avoidance tactics
"I want everyone to leave the room, except for the cat."
Tags:pet, pets, cat, cats, will, wills, death, dying, deathbed, death bed, deaths, everyone leave, leave, leaving, wish, wishes, final wish, final wishes, last wish, last wishes, final-wish, last-wish, final-wishes, last-wishes, cat, family, families, love, important, importance, priority, priorities
'It doesn't look good. He's writing a farewell blog.'
"Get me my gun. I want to squeeze off a few last rounds."
Tags:death, dying, deathbed, deathbeds, death bed, death beds, bed ridden, bed, beds, old age, old man, old men, elderly, senior, seniors, senior citizen, senior citizens, man, men, gun, guns, firearm, firearms, rifle, rifles, hunt, hunting, hunter, hunters, gun owner, gun owners, shoot, shooting, violent, violence, gun violence, last wish, last wishes
"You were always my favorite to manipulate."
Tags:grandparent, grandparents, mother, mothers, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, daughter, daughters, mother and daughter, mothers and daughters, hospital, hospitals, dying, manipulation, manipulator, manipulators, bad parent, bad parents, bad parenting, death bed, on death bed, favourite child, favorite child, favourite children, favorite children, grandmothers
"We're letting him think there's a big media deathwatch."
Tags:deathwatch, deathwatches, ego, ego-stroking, ego stroker, ego strokers, big up, big ups, bigging up, self-esteem, self-esteem boost, self-esteem booster, self-esteem boosters, deathbed, deathbeds, death bed, death beds, terminal, terminal condition, terminal conditions, sense of importance, importance, inflated, self-worth, egotist, egotists, egotistical, white lie, white lies, lie, liars, liar, good friend, good friends, public figure, public figures, minor celebrity, minor celebrities, status, social status, die, dies, dying
'Mind if I go in first?'
'Sure, as a young man I had dreams: fame, adventure...paying off my student loans.'
"My dying wish is that you all take off your clothes and get in bed with me."
"I should have bought more crap."
Tags:consumer, consumerism, consumerist, capitalism, capitalist, capitalists, deathbed, death bed, regret, regrets, wish, wishes, wish fulfillment, final wish, final wishes, wish fulfilment, unfulfilled, dying wish, dying wishes, retail therapy, lament, laments, lamentation, lamenting, conspicuous consumption, priority, priorities
"I don't like his color."
'Just in case I want you to shorten your bucket list down to just one thing you can do in this room.'
"And, for God's sake, don't let anyone finish my novel!"
Tags:novel, novels, novelist, novelists, writer, writers, author, authors, ego, egos, deathbed, deathbeds, will, wills, last will and testimony, death bed, death beds, doctor, doctors, last request, last requests, unpublished works, death-bed, death-beds, egotist, egotists, big headed, big head, big-head, big-heads, big heads, big-headed, egotist, egotists, ego, egos, egotistical, unfinished work, unfinished works
"Any chance I could pop back in and put on a clean shirt?"
"You have turned out well, my sons. I can go in peace."
'Go to the light, Dasher, go to the light!'
"I want to be cremated and have my ashes sprinkled on the Republican Party."
Tags:republican, republicans, republican party, republican party member, republican party members, gop, grand old party, loyal, loyalist, the base, lifelong member, lifelong members, revenge, get revenge, getting revenge, vengeance, deface, defaces, defacing, conservative, conservatives, conservatism, cremated, last wish, last wishes, deathbed, deathbeds, death bed, death beds, last rites, vow, vows, final vow, final vows
'I wish I'd spent more time on the internet.'