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Forensics says it wasn't the pease porridge hot or the pease porridge cold. It was the pease porridge in the pot that killed her. Apparently it was nine days old...
He was forced to take early retirement.
"...and our show 'Cooking with fresh ingredients' has been moved to next week."
Grandad ! Stop that - you retired from the tank corps 45 years ago!
'... and what is the sell-by date on the packet, madam?'
"These drugs are nearing their expiry dates - gotta use 'em up!"
"It's past its sell-by, best-by and use-by dates, but its kills-by date is still good."
Best if married by 7-19-09,
Food that were good for you.
"It's not expensive, sir, when you consider it's long smell-by date!"
"I think we need one that shows the oldest food in the country."