Bad Husband Cartoons and Comics

"What do you mean, 'When did I have the time to have an affair??!' I MADE the time!"

Lousy parents... inadequate husband... sad little doggie...

'I went through all one hundred and fifty channels and not a single thing on. So what the heck, want to talk?'

"Gays and lesbians aren't a threat to the sanctity of my marriage. It's all the straight women who sleep with my husband."

'You're right... I just don't get it. And I recall a time, not so very long ago, when you loved that about me!'

"Don't think of it as divorce, Henry. Think of it as freedom...the next time you cheat on me with your secretary, it won't be cheating anymore."

"That's good old Ralph for you. Even when he's with the girl he loves, he loves the girl he's near."

"You know, it would be nice if, every once in a while, I got credit for hearing the first part of almost everything you say."

"Howard! You slept in the wrong apartment again."

"A man can't fully enjoy golf until he has a family of his own to avoid."

"I wanted to get her a car instead of that ten carat diamond ring, but I couldn't find a fake Mercedes."

Monument to the one who did the dishes yesterday

"They've named a star cluster, and the woman across the street's bedroom, after me."

"You don't get rid of him that easy, Mrs. Jacowsky."

"Thank you, but I think I can manage."

'I knew something was wrong when the dirty dishes kept piling up in the sink.'

Will robots ever replace man?

'Of course I bought you a new mop for your birthday. You needed one!'

'But wouldn't it be better to celebrate your wife's birthday with your wife?'

'I forgot the wife's birthday!'

'The anniversary was bad enough, but this time I forgot her NAME!'

'But I can't be the world's WORST husband that would be too much of a coincidence!'

'You can't win with him - if he isn't drunk he's sober.'

"Am I a good husband?"